… (Previous page – 9 Secrets To Make a Long Distance Relationship Work) what you can control and knowing what leads to relationship success…
There are some tough truths about long distance relationships that, if you can accept them, will make you much more likely to have a successful LDR. At times I need to be blunt without sugarcoating because I want to help you… and sometimes the most helpful way for me to communicate is to make sure it’s clear and direct, so there’s no misunderstanding of what I’m saying.
What you need to understand is that people are going to do whatever they’re going to do. The only person that you’ll ever be able to control is yourself. Moreover, the only emotions you’ll ever have ultimate control over are your own.
So instead of trying to get the other person to feel a certain way, do certain things or be a certain way, put that effort towards controlling your own emotions, actions and reactions since that’s the only place you will ever actually have any control.
When you make being in a great mood your top priority in life, your positive mood spills into the relationship. You put your energy into what you have control over (your mood) and that, in turn, improves your relationship as a bi-product.
Control over the other person is an illusion anyway, and because of this, it only makes sense that you don’t even bother attempting to control the other person since it’s impossible.
Love grows when both people actively remember that they’re choosing the other person. So instead of having harsh rules on what the other person can or can’t do, why not base your criteria for staying together on how much you love choosing each other, every day, and how much you love bringing your best self to the relationship?
Hope it helps,
eric charles