This isn’t the first time I’ve mentioned the importance of mindful eating, and it most certainly won’t be the last. I know that carefully thinking through food choices probably seems like a massive chore (especially when you’re out with friends or tired at the end of the day), but please trust me—it is always worth it. It’s kind of like working out—you’ll never, ever regret doing it! And just like exercise, consistency is key with mindful eating!

How often do cravings hit at mealtime? Do you frequently indulge them? If you wake up in the morning with a hankering for pancakes or a fatty breakfast sandwich, gulp down a glass of water and pause for a minute to ask yourself if it’s really worth it. [continue reading…]

How’s the meal planning coming along, everyone? Are you ready to discuss how to eat healthier at dinner? A lot of people really struggle with making good choices at the end of the day for various reasons. It could be because they are tired, unprepared, or flat out feel like they deserve a treat.

I get it, I’ve been there. But if you want to shake some pounds, you need to commit to being a bit more prepared and mindful in the evenings. Below are a few tips that have helped me tremendously. [continue reading…]

I have been dating this guy for roughly 8 months. Things started out amazing, getting to know each other turned into mutual interest and before long he asked me to be his girlfriend. He even dropped the ‘I Love You’ bomb on me, which was fine because the feeling was mutual. I never invested myself in a relationship 100% before him, but he managed to get me mentally, emotionally, and physically. With all that being said, I understand that a woman should not put too much out there or be too available in the beginning. I did that and lived by that in the past … Hell, I got him by doing that.

Lately, however, I’ve found myself living around him, being super available and maybe even a little needy. I’ve also noticed a change in the way he is around me. He seems to slowly be losing interest. He makes time for me, but I don’t feel like it’s enough and things just feel different.

My question: When you are in a relationship with someone, how do you ensure that he wont lose interest? He says he loves me and wants to have a future but sometimes I feel like his actions aren’t matching his words. Am I reading too much into this? What’s going on?
[continue reading…]

I’ve been seeing this guy for 6 months and we decided to officially become a couple after about a month of dating.  Lately he’s been withdrawn and doesn’t give me nearly any attention.  When we’re together we sleep together, but recently he became really emotional (like he was going to cry) and was telling me that “I deserve better than him” and that “he’s not good enough for me.”  What does my boyfriend really mean when he says that?

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Now that you’re starting off your day with a healthy breakfast, we can move on to lunch. Breakfast is my favorite meal of the day, so I let myself indulge a little in the morning (ie. Homemade French Toast or Almond Butter Jar Oatmeal), which usually makes it easier for me to eat healthy the rest of the day.

How many of you are squirming in your seat as you count down the minutes until lunchtime? If you’re reaching for your lunch at 11:59am every day, take a second to pause and ask yourself if you are actually hungry yet. If your tummy is really grumbling at this time, you might need to go back and reevaluate what you had for breakfast.

Whenever I start getting antsy for lunch at noon, but I know that I’m not hungry, I distract myself with a project at work to take my mind off eating. (Don’t eat just because the clock says it’s time, as Bethenny Frankel says.) I’ll say, “Ok, I’m not going to get out of my chair until I finish X.” And usually, a whole hour passes, I feel good about being productive and then I’m ready to eat! Students can follow the same rule with homework or reading assignments.

So, what are you eating for lunch? Do you plan it the night before? Eat vending machine popcorn? Grab a slice of pizza? Or do you skip it all together? I hope not! [continue reading…]

We’re going to go back to basics today and talk about breakfast. Are you eating it? Regularly? Does your morning meal sustain you until lunch? Yes, folks, everything your mom told you about the first meal of the day is true: It’s important.

Why you should eat in the am: When you eat breakfast, you are literally doing just that…breaking the fast from the night before. You need fuel in your tank to function at your best and to rev up your metabolism. If you skip breakfast, your body will hold onto the food you consume next (lunch) for as long as possible instead of burning it right away. Essentially your body is saying, “Food, finally! Gotta hold onto these nutrients—who knows when I will get them again!”

Weight loss and eating breakfast has been linked multiple times, so do I really need to convince you to make this a priority? Plus, who doesn’t want an opportunity to eat?! Also, studies have shown that those who skip breakfast have a tendency to consume more food than usual the next chance they get and have a higher tendency to snack on high-calorie foods. [continue reading…]

Now that summer is over and the temps are getting cooler, it’s only natural to get a case of the blahs. But don’t give up and undo your good efforts and hard work from previous months—I won’t let you! Whether you’re seriously going through a rough time or just find yourself a bit bored with life in general, think about these rules the next time you want to Band-Aid the situation with a bag of Doritos. [continue reading…]

I went out with a guy that I dated once for a bit, but he didn’t want to be my boyfriend officially and we stopped talking for a while.  I saw him the other night and I happened to be all made-up and looking hot.

His eyes widened and he was speechless – then all of a sudden he started talking about becoming my boyfriend again.  I was shocked, but I’ve wanted to be a couple with him for a while.  I need to know though:  Does he only want to be my boyfriend because I looked hot that night?  Does he just want to be a couple because of my looks?

[continue reading…]

Now that you’re getting more sleep and consuming less sugar (right?), it’s important to take a closer look at how you are setting yourself up to succeed in your weight loss efforts. Are your choices helping you or making it harderfor you to reach your goals? Because really, healthy eating is not about willpower—it’s about making conscious decisions that help make it easier for you to make good decisions. Chew on this: [continue reading…]

The last time I checked in, I emphasized the importance of making small, conscious lifestyle changes. Continue to think about how these efforts can really impact the big picture—whether you set an intention to go on a walk twice a week, drink more water daily, increase the intensity of your workouts or add more veggies to your meals.

Now, I’m going to hit ya with a little tough love and ask you to take it a step further. I know this might not be very much fun, but you really need to start taking control of—and owning up to—your actions. What do I mean? Well, I’ll put it in language we all can understand these days: Facebook.

Status Update #1 @ 4pm: Third Starbucks trip of the day! #grandesoylattePLEASE
Status Update #2 @ 1:30am: Omgggg Why am I still awake??? #fml
Status Update #3 @ 9am: Need…coffee…now #ughhhh

Ok, so I’m exaggerating a bit to make a point, but I HAVE seen similar updates on Facebook. The thing is, when it comes to your body, everything is connected. Don’t drink multiple cups of caffeine a day—particularly late in the afternoon—and then wonder why in the world you can’t get to sleep at night! Sure, there may be other contributing factors, but trust me, your Starbucks habit is not helping.

People in general tend to make excuses that have them believing there’s just nothing they can do to change. I know, I used to be one of them. But it’s time to get a grip and think about three of the biggest hindrances to weight loss: [continue reading…]

I’ve been seeing this guy for the past month. He’s been very sweet and I really like him.  He lives over an hour away, works during the week and hunts on the weekends, so seeing him regularly has been difficult.

At times he would text me in the mornings, but then he gets busy. Eventually, he started going days without texting unless I send him a text first.

He’s talked about us doing things together in the future.  He’s even said nice things about me to his mom.  But now it’s been two days without a response to my last text – did I do something wrong?  Should I send him another text?

[continue reading…]

My boyfriend and I had a good relationship, but mutually agreed that a long distance relationship was not for us. Just before he moved to another state, I told him that it would be easier for me emotionally if I cut off contact with him completely. He said he didn’t want to but ultimately he agreed to it…

It’s been three weeks and I miss him. I want to reconnect with him, but I don’t know how to re-establish contact with him after telling him that I wanted to cut off all contact. Any advice?

[continue reading…]

For the better part of my adult life, I was a Monday through Thursday calorie-counter. Once Friday hit, I’d loosen my belt juuuust a little…and then a little more, and then…by Sunday night, I’d find myself sitting on my couch in baggy sweats staring at the bottom of yet another empty pint of ice cream declaring, “I’m going to be good on Monday!” For me, this cycle was normal. In fact, at the time I assumed that everyone ate their body weight in junk food on Sunday night!

When I diagnosed myself as an emotional eater last year, a sense of self-awareness came over me. I have always prided myself as being an optimistic, resilient person, but I realized that when it came to food, I was quite resentful and angry. Why can’t I just eat a freakin’ cupcake and not have to think about it?! How can she polish off a burger and fries and stay so skinny? (Sound familiar?) Simply put, I was pissed off that making consistently healthy choices always seemed like such a chore.

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I’ve been dating a guy who I have known for a while for a month. The dates have all been amazing, we have so many core values, beliefs, and lifestyle aspects in common.

However, the part where we have sex and he withdraws happened.  I’ve been totally cool about it, giving him all the space in the world, no calls, texts, emails. My Facebook page (which I know he looks at) makes it clear I’ve been out with friends, at events, and that good things are happening at work.

My questions are: Is ANY contact okay during this withdrawal, or is all contact off limits for a while (the “Rules” say it is…)? How long do I give the withdraw period before realizing he doesn’t want to take things further? Is there anything a girl can do, apart from knowing that the guy would be crazy to not want her and continue to have an awesome life?  And is there any other form of encouragement we can provide that lets him know we are interested in him, but not sitting around helplessly?

[continue reading…]

Pretty much everyone who knows me (including my 1,181 Facebook friends) is aware of the fact that that I am an avid Bethenny Frankel supporter. Whether you love her, hate her or simply just don’t get her, there is one thing I can say about this savvy businesswoman: She makes a heck of a lot of sense (and money!).

After reading Naturally Thin, I stopped obsessing about food; The SkinnyGirl Dish taught me that healthy cooking doesn’t have to be labor-intensive and A Place of Yes prompted me—immediately—to pursue a career as a nutrition counselor.

Here’s where where my journey with food and emotional eating began… [continue reading…]

I have been seeing this guy for awhile now. He told me  that he loves me twice and I told him I loved him as well.

However, he started to back off a bit and out of the blue I got an email saying he is scared because he fell in love with me and has been acting distant in an attempt to push me away because he’s getting “too emotionally attached.”

I am apparently too addictive and the relationship is complicating his life and making it difficult. I am lost on this one. Should I just forget him? How can a guy fall in and out of love like that?

[continue reading…]

When my boyfriend and I broke up, he gave the reason that he’s not sure he can make me happy, because he’s not happy and he doesn’t want to bring that into the relationship if he can’t make the girl as happy as he is.

What does this all mean?  What do you think he’s going through and how can I help him get through this phase?

[continue reading…]

I have been with my boyfriend for over a year and  I do not understand why he won’t stop flirting with other girls. I give him everything that he needs sexually, emotionally, physically and mentally, but still he flirts with other girls and has sexy conversations with them.  He never meets up with them, though.

I know he loves me because he told me first and he is a genuine person, but I hate feeling like I’m sharing him.  What should I do?

[continue reading…]

I have been with my boyfriend for 10 months and aside from a few ups and downs, we have a happy relationship. However, there is one unresolved issue which has caused a lot of fights. He has this close girl friend who he used to have a crush on, but then decided was better off as a friend after getting to know her. In the beginning of our relationship, he would talk a lot about her and how “cute” she is  but he stopped when he realized I was getting jealous.

Now the main problem. I was using his laptop and saw she had written to him on Skype and couldn’t help but check. Their previous conversation showed up with phrases like “love you” from her and “miss you so much” from him.  I was shocked but could not really say anything about it.

I know saying those kinds of things with friends isn’t such a big deal, but my boyfriend is not the kind of person who says I miss you easily. I know that I can get jealous easily which is why I wanted a second opinion.  Do I react? If so, what do I say? Will he not be able to trust me if I say something?

[continue reading…]

I know that guys view life like a game. Their mind is very stimulated and if they beat the game at level 1 and discover all the hidden gems then they won’t be interested in the game anymore, they’ll move on to the next.

So how do you keep mystery when you are dating someone? When he asks questions about your life do you tell him everything? And when he asks about your plans are you descriptive ? How can you balance between being mysterious yet captivating?

[continue reading…]

I developed an habit of snooping around in my relationship of almost two years and I finally got caught snooping through his phone the the other night (up until this point he didn’t know how I knew things that I called him out on).

Is there anything I can do for damage control? Do men get over such behavior? Help! [continue reading…]

So you’ve got a guy you’re friends with and somewhere along the line you develop feelings for him. Unfortunately, he only sees you as a friend.

Tough situation. It happens to guys and it happens to girls and oftentimes, it can cause more heartbreak than an actual breakup.

Why?

Well maybe one (or all) of these scenarios apply to your situation. You get along better with him than anyone else. You “get” each other. He’s the only guy that you’ve ever felt truly understands you and with whom you can truly be yourself. He’s cute, he’s funny, and when he’s around you, he completely let’s his guard down.  You get to see him as the man he truly is – an unguarded version of himself that he hides from the world and only seems to let you see.

You trust each other.  You might even say that you love each other. And you love every little thing about him… you can talk for hours or even just be with each other in silence… and you know exactly what the other person is thinking.

So why, in the midst of this seemingly perfect situation, aren’t you any more than friends?  Or worse, why (when you told him how you felt about him) does he say, “I really love you. You’re the most important girl in the world to me and I’ll always be there for you but I can’t be in a relationship with you – we need to just be friends.”

Well, I’ll give you a few reasons and I’ll also give you the ultimate pull-no-punches guide to getting out of the friend zone.

[noinsert]

Take The Quiz: Does He Like You?

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My boyfriend dumped me and says that he wants to stay single forever and wants to give up everything we had together. He said it’s his choice and told me not to bring it up again. I asked if we could still be good friends and he said yes. I asked him if he still loved me but he went offline.

I don’t know what to do because I really want him back. Is there a way to get him to give it a second chance? I have really strong feelings for him and just wish we could start over and make it work.

[continue reading…]

My boyfriend and I are currently in a long distance relationship and my issue, whether we are together or apart, is that I don’t know how to express what I need from him in a way that doesn’t come across as being needy. For example, I need more contact than he is giving me, like a regular phone call once a week and a few more texts than he sends.

His work and my work make it difficult but it is not impossible. How do I tell him that without contact the connection between us fades for me and makes me feel unloved even though in reality I know he loves me very much? I just want to be able to tell him what I want without sounding needy. Is this possible? 

[continue reading…]

It’s time to have a frank discussion about lying and deceit. I see a lot of fears floating around in the the dating world and it can be disheartening.

In order to have a truly fulfilling relationship (or even start a healthy relationship) with a great guy, you need to come from a place of strength, confidence, and fulfillment.

Whenever a relationship goes sour (or fails to launch), it’s almost always caused by some tiny fear, doubt, worry or insecurity that grows and festers until you feel overwhelmed by the whole ordeal.

And what happens?  Your fears and worries compel you to confirm whether they’re real or imaginary.  You stop enjoying the relationship for what it is and start craving validation and confirmation that it’s “the real deal.”

And there’s only one thing that manifests from that place… neediness.

QUIZ: Are You Accidentally Destroying Your Love Life?

These days, people are quick to  throw the concept of neediness around without actually looking at what it is. I’ve had some of my female readers complain that the term neediness makes it sound like I’m framing women as weak, fragile, insecure creatures that just cling to men (and stress them out).

Nothing could be further from the truth.  I think women bring a tremendous strength and power to the table in relationships… when they have access to it and are free of their own fears.

Men and women have fears. Those fears are greater now more than ever really since there’s an entire industry devoted to making sure men and women are wrought with insecurities so they buy products (sowing in and agitating tiny insecurities is the bread and butter of the marketing world).

A major fear is being lied to deceived which brings me to the main question of this article: Why do men lie?

[continue reading…]

I have noticed that you guys (and most dating advice sites, actually) focus a lot on things women do, but do you send men emails to help them with things? It just seems like women are somehow always the problem. It should go both ways to help a relationship, shouldn’t it?

Why is it that women are the ones who have to work on making the relationship better?  [continue reading…]

I’ve had a “casual” thing going with a guy for 6 months, mostly sexual. Two months ago, I told him I couldn’t do the casual thing anymore and since then things have been heading downhill fast. Today was my birthday and he didn’t even wish me a happy birthday!

I don’t want this anymore but I’m getting mixed advice from people. Some tell me that I should text him and tell him that I don’t want to do it anymore and others tell me that I should just stop texting and just ignore him if he reaches out, which I find particularly cruel.

What should I do?

[continue reading…]

There was a guy who seemed interested in me, but at the time I was pursuing another guy. Things have changed and I’m interested in this guy now, but a mutual friend told me that I “missed my chance and he’s moved on.”

He seemed like he liked me before and I think he might now, but I can’t tell if he’s into me or one of the other girls that he hangs out with. How can I tell if I still have a chance with him? How do I know if he still likes me?
[continue reading…]

Meeting guys and having guys interested in me is not a problem.  I don’t want to sound arrogant, but I’m in good shape and everyone tells me how pretty I am so I don’t doubt my physical attractiveness.

Here’s the thing: There is a guy I see a lot (he’s a friend of a friend) and I’ve developed a crush on him. I was trying to find out if he was into me and a friend of mine quoted him saying that I was a “cool girl, but not his type”.

I really like this guy – I want to understand why he doesn’t like me and if there’s anything I can do to get him to like me and see me as a romantic interest.

[continue reading…]