A bit confused on how to respond to this guy I met on a dating app


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  • #931998 Reply
    Sam

    I have been talking to this guy on a dating app. He sent a like and I thought why not. We have been talking a few weeks and it’s been okay but some messages he has sent are weird. Like “Have I ever made out in a car”. Some normal conversations were what is my favorite thing to do on a date. I even told him I would like to do a day date. I would like to talk to people more in the day and I feel a bit safer. I work nights so it would not work for a night date, but he says he likes late night dates. He said ” I like night dates, there more chill. Like after movies just chilling in the car with no surroundings” Honestly I did not really feel comfortable when he texted that. I had told him I don’t really have much experience with dating since in high school I was always busy with school and extracurricular activities so I didn’t get to date much. When I went to college I worked and did night classes until going to university. I went to school during the day. When the pandemic hit only 6 months after I started university it became more difficult to make friends and date. We are not dating only talking but he has already called me babe once. I just overlooked it because at the time I was hanging out with my friends. He had asked a few days ago we should go on a date sometime. I said sure and for a few days no response. If he didn’t respond back, I was going to leave it at that. But yesterday he texts me saying what have I been doing. I tell him I have been a bit busy with work (we are a bit understaffed) and I have been studying for my permit test that I took Monday and I started practiced driving again.

    Some things he texts don’t make sense to me, like, “Take it slow on driving like slow when you riding lol, It’s gets crazier when you go fast” Again I over looked and told him my mom thinks I am doing pretty good at driving so far, just a bit more practice and I can get my license. Just driving in some parts where I live are crazy since some speed limits on a street is 50mph. We talked a bit about traffic but then he says “Will you drive my crazy too?” He had a few typos. This was last night after my driving lesson.

    This morning he text me, “Kind want to make out with you loll. Are you down?” I have not responded since last night. I was taken aback when I saw that notification. It makes me think he is not looking for a relationship, but probably more casual or a hookup. I don’t know how to respond or if I should just unmatch with him. I need some advice. I have not really dated much. FYI he does not have my number we are only texting through that app

    #932003 Reply
    Raven

    Honestly @Sam, this guy is creepy… Very

    #932007 Reply
    AngieBaby

    A couple of things I said on another thread go here too. If a guy makes any kind of sexual comment, especially before you even meet, it’s an instant block and forget him. And also, you’re giving way too much information about yourself he doesn’t need to know yet. Telling him you don’t have much experience dating – that’s like telling a shark you really don’t know how to swim. You just tagged yourself as easy prey.

    Please unmatch and block so he can’t reach you anymore. What Raven said – this guy is a major creeper.

    #932008 Reply
    Sam

    @ Raven The more I look at his messages the more I think he is a bit of a perv and a creep. I am thinking of rejecting him and unmatching but what is a nice way to do so?

    #932010 Reply
    Sam

    @ Raven and @Angiebaby Thank you for your advice and I will definitely keep what you said in mind for the future. I will unmatch this guy and most likely report him on the app as well. I had considered just saying to him “Sorry but no” and just unmatching but when I unmatch our entire conversations will disappear anyway. He has not sent any messages since this morning either.

    #932013 Reply
    Peggy

    Sam, don’t worry about hurting his feelings…just stop responding. Also don’t message with a guy for more than a few exchanges. If after a few messages or at a max, a week goes by and he does not ask you out-then he is not really interested or he is a “timewaster”. I mean ask you to a specific event, like coffee or bowling etc. With a day, time and place. Good luck and be choosy!

    #932015 Reply
    Sam

    Thank you @ Peggy. In the beginning, I felt confused about what to do but I feel better now. I am already unmatched with him and our conversation will no longer be visible to me or him.

    another guy who did match with has been talking for a few weeks as well and he actually seems like a nice guy, He has recommended books and shows to watch. Yesterday as well he had asked if I would be interested in a museum date since he knows I like history and he wants to visit more in our city. I had not replied yet since I am trying to figure out what to say because I am still learning to drive and the times I go to the museums with my friends we go by bus

    #932016 Reply
    Sam

    Also from the last post, I did not tell the guy who asked for a museum date about my dating life or experience or about learning to drive

    #932019 Reply
    Mary

    Yeah girl, Raven and the other Queens are right…

    For the museum guy, do what makes you comfortable. You can see him for fun and for getting to know him. And see how it goes. Just pay attention to the red flags.

    #932020 Reply
    Khadija

    He is interested in hooking up. He has hinted in numerous messages where his mind is at. If that’s not what you want stop responding to him. These guys quickly get the hint and move on.

    #932026 Reply
    Liz Lemon

    Museum guy sounds nice. If you’re comfortable meeting him, just tell him you’ll meet him at the museum and take the bus there like you do with your friends.

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