Am I over reacting

Why the yelling? That’ll get you squat…

He’s lying, he knows he’s lying.

Is the coworker new to his work?
Does he have other friends that are women?
It’s good to say you don’t like it , but just don’t go from 1 to 100 – ask yourself why it angers you.

Seems like this is a build up, not just her

Absolutely stand your ground. If this is a deal breaker then it is. 6 years is a very long time that he should respect the relationship enough to not entertain other women like this.

I’m lost at what to do. He admitted he had feelings for her but loves me . She knows about the issues in our relationship . He told me he shut it down with her, 3 times but it hasn’t stopped – she keeps pursuing him and I know he likes her and is struggling with his decision . Am I weak for wanting to fight for him ?

Why do you want this man? She probably doesn’t even know about you. He’s playing you and her. If he has to chose between the two of you, don’t give him a choice, take yourself out of the equation. Why would you want someone who sees that they can have a choice between you and someone else? Why do you want to see yourself as an option?

He stated clearly he has feelings for her. Leave him to his feelings for her.

He emotionally cheets, he lies, he gaslights you… What a catch!

Agree with the comments here. She may be a coworker, but if she’s sending him snaps etc. then he didn’t really shut anything down because he didn’t block her (and nothing they are working on requires her to send him selfies, so that’s no excuse for them not to stick with professional modes of communication only). And he didn’t block her because he didn’t want to. If she knows about your relationship problems then that’s gross because why is he talking to a coworker he’s attracted to about your dirty laundry? Very disrespectful. And if she doesn’t know about you, then even worse,he wants the attention more than he wants a relationship with you. Yes, 6 years is a long time so it makes sense you’re looking to figure things out with him, but he’s not putting in the effort with you to do the same right now. So do what Tallspicy suggests. Fighting for him at this point looks like you standing your ground by respecting yourself. Anything else is letting him get away with too much and then he’ll walk all over you until he walks out.

If he were serious about his relationship with you, he would cut her off. (Wouldn’t have even started up with her in the first place.) This isn’t how you treat your live-in GF, flirting with a girl at work and flaunting it. Pack up and leave and do not look back no matter what he says or does. He’s showing you who he really is. If he is capable of doing this once, he WILL do it again. I know it’s not what you want to hear, but his choices are clearly indicating this is not salvageable. He isn’t choosing you. He’s made you into the side chick. He’s not worth fighting for. There’s also no way you can win this anyway, you’re in a weak position.

YOU boot him out! Why inconvenience yourself.

Tell him, if he wants her so badly, go live with her!!

Raven makes a good point.

Check your legal position before you leave. Is it his or your home? Do you rent? Are you both on the lease or mortgage payments? Whatever the situation, find out your legal rights and obligations before you do anything.

One of you has to find another place to live. He’s openly cheating on you and it’s completely unacceptable.

So I’ve told him to move out , and that I am breaking up with him . We own a house together which makes it complicated I’m no longer angry , I forgive him but I told him it’s hard to forget everything that happened over 3
Months . The worst part is him seeing me so hurt over this and continuing with his actions . I hope I’m making the right decision . He wants to work on our relationship , and mend things , but I can’t look past it . Sad this is now I feel sorry for him , I hate seeing him upset even though he created this mess ! He is in denial I think ? And still tries to
Talk about our future, and I have to remind him that I want to break up.
Also someone started to talking to me on social media , this has been a good distraction. I welcomed it to make me feel better. he wants to meet though. Is it wrong of me to meet up with someone else ? Not a formal date . And not hooking up

Danger zone – don’t weaken and back down and let him worm his way into staying. Keep re-reading your posts on this thread when you “feel sorry” for him. He’s not sorry for what he did, he knew what he was doing when he started up with her and kept it up even when you told him how you felt. I repeat, he never should have been hanging out with another woman in any capacity – you are his committed partner of six years and you own property together. That’s a dealbreaker, full stop. He will do it again, 99% chance. A man who loves, values and wants a future with his woman simply doesn’t do what he did.

I agree with Michelle – not sure I get the black and white stuff – but getting attention from someone else isn’t a good idea right now. That could really blow up on you. My suggestion is tell him you are going through a break-up and need some time to process and back off. Don’t meet him now.