Any success stories of dating separated man who you leave whilst sort out life

What – what? You’ve dated this man less than two weeks, so maybe been out 3-4 times at most, and you’ve already “grown to adore him” and it’s an amazing connection and you’re anxious about the future and the financials are taking longer than you thought. This doesn’t add up. You hardly know this man. Would you please explain this situation in more detail??

The vast majority of separated not fully divorced man are poor prospects for relationships that last. You made a good decision to walk before you got even more attached. Heck, even fully divorced men, if it’s too soon and they haven’t done the processing and healing aren’t good prospects.

I’ve only seen a couple of people get back together if the reason to call it off was one of the parties was separated and not ready to move on quite yet.

Leave this guy alone COMPLETELY and let him go through what he needs to. I know it sounds like a cliche but if it was that an amazing connection, he’ll come back. You don’t have to do anything and you shouldn’t do anything to force that to happen!

That would be ridiculous!!! Sorry I meant we’ve split up for less than 2 weeks…4months dating!!

separated men are still married , in most cases they go back to their wives sooner or later. Even if they don’t, they start fresh after fully divorcing instead of staying with a girl they dated while going through the separation.

She had an affair which he almost wanted to happen as an excuse to leave her….which he did..but then they tried again and again for kids.. and eventually he had enough…this was over a year ago and they are definitely separated, live in different floors of a massive house plus they alternate their days working in lthe city (he lives i mainly in country and city 2/3 nights a week until the kids move out when can spend more time in the city) and def getting divorced..she tried to reconcile recently but they do not have anything in common/different people and he can’t wait to move on with his life. He’s in therapy and realises he is mourning more the loss of the nuclear family rather than her although he wants to be amicable. He did think about staying and just having affairs but realised that he actually wants a meaningful relationship /maybe marriage in the future and to just be happy which he wasn’t .
He wasn’t looking for a relationship but I guess we met and he found himself almost in one ….i know I made him feel again and that he liked me. I just wanted to know him more and deeper but realised that couldn’t happen right now so ended it before he would inevitably pull back

I know of just one, and it only worked out because they’d gotten together too young and grew apart to the point where it got toxic long before they’d separated. The guy started therapy to cope and learn more mature relating skills than the ones he brought into a relationship that started when he was practically still a kid. That meant that by the end of the marriage he was already both working on himself and mourning the failure of the marriage that had truly happened years earlier, versus starting to process all that for the first time during the separation. There were also no kids involved. It still took well over a year to go back to the woman he moved on with, so it needed to also work out that she was still single once he was ready.

There’s two important takeaways for you: you deserve better than to have to put your life on hold for someone else’s healing journey, and once he does heal he may be a different man than he is right now since he’s still living with his wife and hasn’t had a chance to figure out who he is post-divorce without her yet. He may not be the man you got to know once this is all said and done, especially if he married her when he was young or if he was a big problem in his own marriage and needs to fix some of his own stuff. Not saying he’ll be “worse,” but he will likely be different and may not be looking for the same type of new relationship he’s looking for right now when he’s still in an unstable emotional transition period, or simply may not click with you as well then. He also needs time to figure out co-parenting, as hopefully figuring out his relationship with his kids is his main focus (besides healing) before he focuses on seriously dating again.

AngieBaby is right, too. I understand it’s appealing to wonder “what if” about this, but it’s one of those things you can’t control and don’t want to emotionally close yourself off waiting around because it’s in the back of your head. If it works out because the timing is right in the future, great maybe (or maybe it’s still a honeymoon period fantasy and he’s not right for you even later), but you made the right decision cutting it off and giving him the space he needs. Don’t let it stop you from living your life in the meantime.

Oh wow. I could only see up to Ewa’s comment when I wrote my response. That’s a mess, do yourself a favor and stay gone, and then do yourself another favor and ask why you would pair off with someone that unavailable in the first place.

“He did think about staying and just having affairs” — even if he didn’t ultimately decide to do this, the fact it was his initial thought on how to properly handle the situation means he’s no where near a mature emotional place to be a good partner. He’s got a lot to learn in order to make good adult decisions, don’t be his guinea pig. That’s assuming he’s ever really getting divorced at all…

U did the right thing by breaking off before things got too deep. If hes hving issues resolving financials with the wife, by the time he does settle and gets divorced, he wld be too drained emotionally mentally and financially to be willin to risk getting into another potentially serious committed relationship that soon. Most wld need time to get over and heal from broken marriages unless the divorce with wife is smooth sailing and amicable. If this thing btwen u guys is the real deal and he feels the same, he may connect when the divorce is behind him, hes healed and luking forward to opening the next chapter with someone else in his life.