Ask Me Anything – Sunday, December 13th @ 8 PM ET

I got a big problem here. Me and this guy has been a good friend for about a year, and i confessed to him about 5 months after we knew each other, but sadly he already had a girlfriend during that time. But we still friend as usual, and luckily we seemed to be closer after my confession. And 4 months after my confession, that was when I was badly hurt, he contacted me that night and out of sudden he said that “If only you tell me earlier that you like me, we might be together now.” We grow closer and he even told me about her gfriend,but he already want to breakup with his gfriend before her birthday, but still be friend with her. But, after an event that we joined togther, I accidentally told a stranger about his breakup and that stranger told him about what i said,(and probably in different ways from what i told her, because i only told her about the things that i like him, and breakup but he said in the text that there were other things she(the stranger) didnt want to tell him.). We didnt talk for a month, and right after i knew what happened, i continuously say sorry and make an effort just to be the way we were before, but he seemed to be very mad at me. But we did hangout like usual with other friends, but no text messages anymore and he didnt even care when i was badly injured when i fell yesterday. My questions are, does he no longer care about me? Does he really hate me for breaking his trust? He said he did not mad at me anymore, but he’s more to disappointed with me. What should i do? Help me please, I truly love my friendship with him.

I’ve been in an LDR with a guy for the last year. We met through mutual friends and have traveled to see each other almost every month. We communicated almost everyday through some sort of medium and have spent time with each other’s families. The other night while talking on the phone he expressed that he had been thinking about ending our Relationship. He told me that his brain tells me that marrying me I’m a safe, smart, and good decision but that his heart doesn’t feel excited. He says it feels weird. He’s never beenwith a healthy and mature woman and tried to explain that drama doesn’t equal exciting. I’ve expressed that I am willing to move for him so we can be closer.

Should I continue to give him space to let him work through things or are we done? What should I do next?

Hi Eric and Sabrina,

My guy doesn’t want relationship and is afraid of marriage. We are in a 24 hour long distance
“relationship” for more than 2 years!! We used to work together before that and got to know each other only for 5-6 months but no dating till the last month . Then I changed Job (which I had planned before but he didn’t know till that last month). I am in my late 20s. I will move to a place 4 hours from him in 1 month. I both do like each other and have been honest throughout as far as I know. I am also going through some career changes . I do see the potential in this guy but should I stay or just focus on myself and leave this “relationship”.

Hey! Thanks for doing this!

I’m in high school and I have been friends with this guy for a year or so. We are really close but I am starting to be attracted to him and I really want to date him. The only problems are he smokes pot socially on occasion (which can sometimes be a dealbreaker for me) and he constantly retweets sexy pictures of this girl who goes to our school and the pictures are of her in bikinis, bra and underwear, etc., and are pretty overtly sexual. He’s not even just liking them or favoriting them, he is reposting them.

Does this mean that he wouldn’t like a girl like me? (I might look like the exact opposite of her body-wise) Does this mean he doesn’t like me and is interested in this girl? If he is into her, or girls with her body type, I would rather just know so I can stop thinking about him and move the hell on :)

Thanks in advance!

There’s this man at my local gym who recently just started working there. He seems to do a little more with me than the usual hi how are you small talk every time I come in. I’m interested in getting to know him better but I don’t know how to make that first move. So my question is, what’s the best way to make the first move on a man but not embarrass myself either?

Also, a co-worker and I have been flirting recently the last month or so. We’ve exchanged numbers and talk on the phone sometimes but he’s already told me that he doesn’t want a relationship right now. If we ever end up hanging out together outside of work, how do I make sure I don’t fall into the trap of FWB? And if he changes his mind about dating, how do I not let that personal relationship not affect our professional one? Thank you!!

My partner is not over yet with his ex-wife. He easily get tempted to contact her, even I told him it’s hurting me. They have a 7-year old daughter. We’ve talked the issue over and over again, he seems to understands at first but when they see each other he easily forget everything we’ve talked. Maybe he just don’t want to admit himself that he’s not over her, he’s just eluding away from her because the ex-wife has hurt him in the past. They broke up because the wife cheated, but he stayed for a year after the incident trying to fix everything with her. They’re not in good terms when they separate ways and the wife continues to make a trouble because she’s not over him yet as well. What should I do?

I really need some advice my boyfriend and I were together for 5 months exactly before he broke up with me and told me it was because he couldn’t give me what I needed right now, in terms of love and caring. he said things were moving too fast for him, (even though we had no plans of moving in together or anything like that) I just wanted to spend more time with him because he lives about an hour away from me. I have 2 kids, I went through an awful year long divorce, and he has one child he gets maybe 4 days out of the mont. he would never come out and see me except for a handful of times. I would have to drive out to him and he always complains about distance about how things would work out better if there wasn’t so much distance between us. so I put in every effort to see him whenever he wasnt workong or he would want to see me. i missed out on working (I’m self employed) on Saturdays and Sundays, so I could come up and see him any chance I got. all I asked of him was to spend more time with me to drive out to me every once in awhile and think of me when he has something coming up like a Christmas party so that I could try to make arrangements for my kids. he never seem to think of me much in those terms until I would bring it up. which turned into him saying “I didn’t even think about it, when I’m off of work I don’t want to think about work” he told me if I couldn’t go to his Christmas party he already figured that he would take his grandma because she deserves it. Around Thanksgiving time he said he wanted me to meet his sister very badly that was coming up for Thanksgiving from the military. The last I heard she was coming up the 25th but the day before she actually came into town was the monday of Thanksgiving week. I asked him why he didn’t tell me she was going to be here the following day so I could have made arrangements for my kids and he said he just didn’t think about it and that he thought I knew. He then told me that his ex girlfriend would be coming over to see his sister on Tuesday because his sister wanted to see the girls and so she would be hanging out with all of them including him on that Tuesday. And the week prior, we didn’t see each other at all, because he ran up to go rescue his ex girlfriends mother and mother’s boyfriend from being stuck in a ditch. (which was a four hour drive) when they could have simply called a tow truck. i could hardley ever get him to drive to me. i gave this man my whole heart he was wonderful to me and my children in the beginning. I fell in love way too quick and for him to just break up with me and not text or call or give me any kind of closure or even a sign that maybe he misses me is not only devastating to me, it’s devastating my children as well. I just want to understand what happened was I a rebound, from his last relationship? (he was in a previous relationship for over a year and had a daughter with her. they broken up 7 months before we met) I figured that was enough time to not be a rebound
Was I just a distraction to him? ( he would always beat up on his self about having an engineering degree and not being able to find a job so you feels like he wasted his time and feel like a failure) I was always so supportive of him I would tell him how he will get a job and how he is amazing! we will get through this together. but I guess that wasn’t good enough.
I just need some clarification, some closure! my divorce was finalized 8 months before I met him. This man gave me life back for 10 years I was a prisoner in my own home with an emotionally abusive husband. I lost all friends and now I don’t even know how to make them. The man I fell in love with gave me life he took me fishing he took me hiking he took me to do all of these things I haven’t ever gotten to do. he made me feel free! he made me feel alive! So yes, I clung onto this man but I really do love him and I did everything for him. I was always apologizing for wanting to see him or for asking him to call me and NOT just text me. he never wanted to call only text. so i would apologize for being so needy, I apologize for asking for his emotional support seeing as how I have no family except for my two boys and no friends literally.
Can somebody please tell me if he might regret leaving me if he might miss me at all right now? I can’t see myself with anyone but him. he made my children feel so special and seeing them happy makes me happy. he gave us all life, and now we are all crushed.
I did burden him with my issues though being a single mom in primary caregiver it’s hard for me to find a second job that will let me work 9 to 2 so I can pick up my children at 3 and 3:15 drop them off at home and be back to work by 4.

Jess- I don’t like to say “should” in relationships. Every relationship moves at its own speed. At the same time, it could be a sign that he isn’t serious about the relationship. I would bring it up. Just be open and honest and say you think it’s time to meet each other’s families and see how he responds.

I’ve been dating a guy for 6 weeks who claims he wants a monogamous relationship and makes an effort to see me about 3x per week. He always makes the next date before leaving. However, twice he’s said he’s not emotionally available but doesn’t feel we need to do anything different. He’s now very busy at work and doesn’t communicate. Is there anything we can do now to slow down and start over?

My ex broke up with me. I was stressed and I didn’t know he was too at that time. When he was busy, I urged and asked him if he still wants to continue the relationship? He replied “I shouldn’t continue this”.
I was devastated and heartbroken right away and quickly shut him down saying I agreed to this. I felt like we are against all odd and I don’t really feel anything. It was me speaking on emotion but it was not what I meant. A month later, I asked him if his feeling for me is duped, he said No. He said he felt really bad for hurting me and felt like a jerk. He felt like he lost a sense of purpose after breaking up with me. I was rushing things cos I still want him, I pushed him asking if he wants us? If not, I would like to close the book and never look back. I regret what I said cos now not even a day goes by I didn’t think of him. I’m still in love with him. Do I still have a chance to get him back after what I said? Should I contact him back?

is it natural to feel uncomfortable when my boyfriend is hanging out with other girls?

I am in my mid-40’s, look much younger and considered smart, witty & attractive. I have been “online” dating for the past 9 mos… With very little success. I get a lot of interest and go out on many dates, w/men both younger and old than myslelf. The question I have is why is this: why can I have weeks of communication w/a man (email & phone), things seem to be going well… But after 2-3 dates they disappear. Literally this has happened @ least 10 times to me! They just drop off, completely w/no explanation. How should I handle this, if at all? So, I’m wondering if it’s me, which honestly, I’d like to know, so I can understand, & if I’m doing something that I can “adjust”. I’m a bit old fashioned in that I never approach a man 1st, I let him come to me, call, ask for dates etc. I am very successful, educated and wonder if that is intimating? I try to downplay that a bit, but I don’t want to lie when the career subject comes up? I know I can be guarded and maybe that comes across? I’m just so discouraged! I feel like now in in a catch 22, I’m trying to remain open and trusting, but this keeps happening which makes me feel even more guarded. I am that comfortable online dating, for sure, if feels very “unnatural” to me, but I realize it’s the best way for me to meet anyone, since I travel and have children. Honestly, I’ve never had a problem before finding men that wanted to date me. Is it my age? Can you suggest why this might be happening and/or what I may be able to do to avoid this from continuing?
Thanks!