Home › Forums › Complicated Situation / Mixed Signals › boyfriend of over a year has ignored me for a week
- This topic has 29 replies and was last updated 8 years ago by
Elsie.
-
AuthorPosts
-
Elsie
Hello, this exact same thing happened to me about 7 months ago. Suddenly did not hear from BF for 9 days. I didn’t push it because he was busy running his own business. Communication had been regular and we were a couple for almost a year.
I reached out after 10 days to see what was wrong. I got vague answers like “busy”, “sick” or “just tired”. All all excuses that a coward makes when he wants out. Fact of the matter is when communication pattern changes drastically, something is going on.
I don’t put up with BULL from men and have no time for someone who won’t tell it like it is. I found the fortitude to simply stop talking to him period without pursuing further for closure or explanation. Never found out what was truly going on with him and after several weeks I stopped caring.
Funny thing is he did reach out after a month by sending a lame “hey”. I TOTALLY ignored him, not saying a word or showing any anger. A taste of his own medicine. Imagine showing up after a month with a pityful “hey”, are you kidding?
I have since moved on.
Nat
This is hard to believe. Men these days. I can’t imagine any guy of my dad’s generation doing this type of thing. A year of a relationship and then he basically ghosts without giving you any explanation and then a month later – “hey”. I’d like to know the thought process that’s going on behind such glorious actions. Oh maybe better not. I already don’t have a very high opinion of men en mass. But I am always delighted beyond belief when I am proven wrong in this respect. Alas it doesn’t happen often.
Were there any “signs” of his lame character that you missed when you got together with him?
Elsie
I have chalked the whole thing up to him being a PLAYER and a very good actor. Quite possibly he was seeing someone else besides me and decided on the other woman.
In my opinion, I have lost nothing of significance here. He was a fake. NO ONE who has genuine feelings or respect for you would just ghost out of no where and then a month later send a “hey”. What a joke!
I see women on here setting their hearts on a guy WAY TOO EARLY. Don’t get attached so quickly and DON’T be nice to them, you get taken for granted every time. Look at all the posts on this site where the guy pulls away, slowly fades, stops calling as much, etc. Women have got to somehow figure out what the guy is looking for at the start. DO NOT believe his words because they will tell you what you want to heart. Keep elusive and do your own thing – if he wants a relationship and if you are a good prospect to him – he will do the work.
Women please work on asserting your high value to a man by not being so easy and available. Don’t put up with shoddy behavior. Each time we do, our value goes way down, and so does our self-esteem.
Nat
Elise, were they signs from him earlier that you might have overlooked? I agree, decent people don’t do things like that. Men or women. They use other methods of ending a relationship or distancing themselves if they feel they need to do that.
I am interested in find out if there are some common traits in men who do that. Apart from having no balls of course. Like you know, misogynists all have things in common. So I think ghosts do too. What do you think it is in your case?
Elsie
As for earlier signs I saw some things like not being available as much. But I rationalized he was extra busy running his business. His company is thriving so it seemed normal.
He was a smooth operator always said the right things. Another red flag I should have seen.
In essence he was too good to be true.
-
AuthorPosts
