Call him out or let him go?

If it’s easier to villainize him and make him out to be the bad guy, by all means go ahead. But you’ll know you’re really in a healthy place when you can be neutral about it, and just accept that it was not meant to be. Like Maddie said, you can’t date potential. I’ll add, “potential” is all in your head– it’s what you *think* you could have with this guy. But you don’t really know what it would be like to date him. It’s easy to idealize someone you’ve met once, and spoken with on the phone a few times, in 6 months.

I don’t know why it bothers me so much, I know I do miss talking to him. I’ve been sitting and reflecting and I guess it is just disappointing. I felt there was more of a connection than what was actually there. I can’t blame him, he didn’t lead me on or give me false promises, dangled the carrot of hope so to speak but that was about it.

It was nice talking to someone who was the exact opposite of every guy I dated, which was part of his appeal maybe. Everything was ok until I started wanting more and overanalyzing everything. I wanted there to be something when that’s not what he was offering. He was content to be text buddies. And sure, I can spin all kinds of excuses in my head, he’s shy or socially awkward, fear of being rejected but I’m still willing to put myself out there, give him one more chance, reach out one last time but to what end? It isn’t how I want this to go down. I’d probably be even more upset with his nonchalant response or even worse lack thereof. Then I’ve lost my self-respect and just look desperate to have this guy who doesn’t care one way or another. It’s been more than a week now. If he isn’t in the smallest bit curious how I am or what I’m up to, can’t send a hey how are you text/phone call then what am I doing? You know when I had texted him that I had a great time, he didn’t say me too. Just make a joke about the server. That really stung. I hoped after we met it would have changed things for the better but that didn’t happen.

I have to give myself closure on this one and just say it wasn’t meant to be. Whatever his reasons are, that’s just it, they are his reasons and whether he didn’t have a good time with me or isn’t looking for a relationship, I have to let it go. It’s like losing a friend but I want more than friends with him. Looks like I don’t get either of those things. Can’t believe he is just going to go silent. It is very hard for me to let go and sit back but I know it is the right thing. Hurts and is hard to not take it personally but I’ll be ok. Thanks for the support. It helps to just have a place to get it all out.