Home › Forums › Did He Lose Interest? › Can I salvage this or is it not worth it?
- This topic has 6 replies and was last updated 4 years, 9 months ago by
Lane.
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Nameless
So a few months ago I reconnected with someone I was somewhat friends with. It started off as catching up but then out of nowhere he mentioned he saw me on a dating app. This lead to him flirting but then almost instantly apologizing every time because he wasn’t sure if it was appropriate (we met initially through work, I was like an advocate to him nothing of the professional sort). I let him know it was fine and after a while he stopped checking if it was ok. We agreed we wanted to hang out.. we both talked about hooking up and I am not in a place where I want a serious relationship now. Also we talked about how we don’t like chasing people (Even though that’s probably what I’m doing).
Throughout the time we were talking the first 2 months he would flirt, and send dirty texts (no pictures). Communication started slowing down a few weeks ago and the flirting stopped soon there after. It got to the point where I understood he was busy working and had other obligations but he wouldn’t text me. I would text first and it always felt as though I was bothering him. I did ask him out right if he wanted me to slow down texts because he was busy, his reply was “You’re fine” so I would text him but try not to overwhelm him so once every other day. It was going ok until last week when he gave short answers and if I sent a flirty text like hey cutie like I have in the past he just replied hey hey.
I have little patience and I knew I should have left him alone but I texted him stating I just wanted to be blunt and ask if he was still interested in hanging out. He replied “I do hun it’s just my schedule is wild I’m sorry.” I told him I was just going to take that as a no and he said it’s not a no it’s a gotta find time.
The last time I texted him a few days ago I felt as though he was either too busy or didn’t want to talk so I have not messaged him since. I know people say to give them space and they will come to you. I don’t see him texting me so I would have to text him, is it even worth it? I understand busy and if that’s all it is I can work with it. Is he just not the type to text first?
I’m not naïve either I know he’s liking and commenting on other girls posts and truthfully I still scroll through dating apps. I just want someones opinion honestly.
Raven
If you already know the answer…
Kathy
If this man isn’t setting up time to see you he has low interest.. He isn’t even initiating texts, so I think you know your answer. No, this isn’t worth your time.. either to worry about or think about.
Andrea
He wanted sex without a commitment and you gave it. He’s doing a slow fade away now, hoping you’ll get the hint.
Miriam
You were used for sex. He wants nothing else from you.
It’s time to move on.
Franny
First, if you don’t want a serious relationship, why do you care? I swear, women are always claiming they don’t want a serious relationship, then ask why the guy is doing a slow fade.
I see this kind of thing on here all the time; most of the questions are about the guy seeming to be less interested than he was previously. And giving a guy space is not a guarantee he will come back. It’s not a game; it’s not a trick. The only “trick” is to know when a guy isn’t interested and not chase after him.
Guys are not complicated; they really aren’t. Stop chasing him, stop texting him, and live your life. When you meet a guy who really does like you and wants to see you, you won’t have to wonder.
Lane
There is absolutely nothing to salvage. He was having a little flirty fun with you but had no intention of following through or he would have the moment you gave him the green light. Honestly, you are not a challenge at all, and when you go in ‘chase mode’ a man is going to flee if he has zero intentions of starting anything with you.
Let this one fade, stop e-tethering him, and find better things to do with your time than chase a time waster. I agree with the Franny in that if you didn’t really care about a serious relationship you wouldn’t give a rats patooty about Mr. Flake and be using your time and energy elsewhere, such as people(family/friends), work, activities and hobbies that brings value, fun or happiness to your life, not endless frustration on a dud.
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