Cheating

PLEASE call a mental health hotline or get an emergency appointment with your doctor or a mental health care professional RIGHT NOW. If the therapist you’re seeing isn’t helping, then find someone else. This is way beyond what strangers on the internet can help you with. You’re at risk and you need proper medical attention.

SITE ADMIN: please step in here!!

Just writing this made me feel so pathetic. I don’t want him. I will try to deal with my situation. Thanks. but I know I won’t be able to…..he has treated me like real garbage, like someone who has no soul, or doesn’t deserve respect like other women do….I just feel so so ashamed of my existence because of what he has do e to me…..I know he doesn’t define me, but that is how all his abuse really makes me feel …..and leaving him doesn’t make me feel any better but yeah being with him doesn’t either…I will see what I can do. I have seen 10 therapists and psychiatrists so far. But I will keep trying. Thanks.

Cold hard facts: No he won’t change. The relationship is over. Block him. Full stop all communication with him. No emails, texts, phone calls, etc. Your mental health is more important than this dude. You have no trust and he is clearly not willing to change anything. It’s a dead end.

Then do what Angiebaby said or contact someone you are already working with for your own mental well being. The first couple of years after a demise of a long term relationship are difficult but you can and will make it through this. Every time you miss him or think about something good with him remember to think about how he broke your trust too. It will help balance the thoughts out.

Meta, I”m very concerned about you. You said you’ve been to 10 different therapists and they aren’t helping. So then I”m not sure why you would think posting anonymously online to get advice on how to handle this man and what sounds like major depression and suicidal thoughts will get you a workable solution when trained professionals haven’t been able to help? I’m concerned posting here and getting casual, amateur advice will get you dependent on others for answers on how to run your life.

The only person who can change your life is YOU. You are perfectly aware this man is bad news and you still can’t walk away after four years of the rollercoaster you’re describing. And honestly – the problem at this point isn’t so much him as you because you keep taking him back. you

That’s why I”m making the case for please find help IRL. You’ve mentioned SUICIDE here and you’re sounding depressed. Posting here is nothing more than a band-aid at best. And no offense but posting here isn’t taking full responsibility for your life and your choices and your mental healthcare. You need professional face to face help dealing with the issues you’ve got and ongoing support in disconnecting yourself from this man. My two cents. I won’t say anything more, that’s all I’ve got – wishing you the best.

If you are in the USA:
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
Hours: Available 24 hours. Languages: English, Spanish.
800-273-TALK (8255)

It doesn’t have to be an emergency situation to call them; they will talk with you if you are suicidal or in emotional distress.

If you don’t want to talk on the phone, there is also a live chat set up, just google it (Lifeline Chat). I am not sure my post will go through with a website link.

We all wish you the best, Meta.

(Edit from moderator: mama attempted to post this earlier today but the forum filter held it back. Thanks, mama!)