Home › Forums › Break Up Advice › Confused Dumpee
- This topic has 6 replies and was last updated 4 years, 11 months ago by
kaye.
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Bridget
I started dating a guy about two months ago. Things moved pretty quickly and we both developed feelings for each other fast. He began introducing me as his girlfriend, made comments such as “we could have just gone on our last first date of our lives,” and that I changed his life for the better. We made lots of future plans. Then last week, he called me and said that he did not see a future between us and that he was ending it. I was stunned. Over the course of the week we kept in touch and continued to hash out the breakup. It came out that he had this “bad feeling” with most girls he has dated. He feels scared it won’t work out and wants to end it now. But he keeps reaching out to me. Is it really over?? Help!
Raven
Let him go & good riddance…
Tallspicy
Tell him to stop contacting you. You are falling for the “I am scared” malarkey. Everyone is scared in a new relationship but not everyone ends one. He is not capable of giving you what you want and please under no circumstances believe that he can unless he goes to a therapist. Tell him that he hast to leave you alone or you will block him. He does not get to have his cake and eat it too and honestly it shows even worse what a terrible dude he is. Healthy good men do not continue to contact women after they have broken up with them. Only pathetic men with poor egos and an inability to deal with being an adult. Good luck and hugs my dear
Liz Lemon
In the future beware of moving things too fast in a relationship. If after only two months you’re very intense, making future plans, and he’s implying that you will be together forever (hence the comment about it being “the last first date of your lives”)– the vast majority of the time those relationships burn out as quickly as they started. It takes time for a deep relationship to develop, and rushing things never works.
I agree with the above comments about cutting off contact. The guy is jerking you around emotionally by continuing to contact you to hash things out. If he’s “scared” he should not be dating! Just cut him off, don’t indulge his BS.
Kathy
Selfish, unhealthy man… Get rid of him! Permanently…
Andrea
Sounds like he plays sexual musical chairs with women.
kaye
As some of the others have pointed out I’ve also found the hotter something burns in the beginning the more quickly it fizzles out!! And a lot of times believe or not it’s been the emotionally unavailable guys who did the most future talking, being together forever, woman of my dreams, so lucky to have met you, etc. Then they get all “scared” or just aren’t “feeling it” anymore. Usually it’s just lust and they tend to move on quickly to the next one.
Sorry but YES I do think it’s really over. He’s probably just reaching out to you out of guilt, wanting to keep you in the wings for easy sex or until he find his next victim.
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