Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Did I scare him off?
- This topic has 6 replies and was last updated 4 years, 9 months ago by
Sensy.
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Ally
I was talking to a guy on a dating site for a month (date was postponed due to coronavirus) and I was so happy because we had lots in common. We had some flirty banter too. However, he always took 2-3 days to reply to my messages right from the start, but when he did his messages were super long with lots of questions. I have gotten so excited about it. He said last week ‘looking forward to meeting you soon! X’
but the other day I decided to send a message saying ‘can I be cheeky and give you my number ‘44…’ message me if you wanted to or on here still is fine!’
4 days later… nothing. No text on the app or anything. I’m worried I’ve scared him off what could I have done differently? Is there anything I can send in like a week’s time as a follow up?
Could it be that he knows we can’t meet up for a while so there’s no point in talking much at the moment and now he’s got my number he can use it to arrange a date at a later date?
mell652
stupid virus spoils everything) don’t worry I don’t think you scared it off good luck with it girlfriend
Newbie
In the past few weeks you have posted about this around 6 times. Its silly. Is it so hard for you to accept he is not interested like you are. Accept it. This didnt even start yet. Even if he does reach out again and asks on a date, you really have to learn to stop to care so fast. Or you will get burned over and over
Tallspicy
You are way over invested in a stranger and you need to give 0 F$cks about random strangers. He is a random stranger. Until a man is your boyfriend, you don’t care what you or he says and does. One other thing, next time just say…
Bob, I prefer to be in contact off the app, here is my number … look forward to talking there ;-). That is much more confident, than the cheeky comment…
And no, you should not follow up. He can find you. If you must follow up, it should be when shelter in place is over in a month or so. Then you can do the following once only – bob, when we were doing our home time I (read, heard, watched) this book, show, music and thought you would love it! Hoping getting back to normal is going awesome!
Then let him take it from there, meaning… he escalates and initiates from there.
Tallspicy
Oops, I did not know you posted before. Please look up anxious attachment and work on yourself before dating. If this is dominating your thoughts, you are not emotionally healthy to be dating. Focus on you. Better use of time.
T from NY
A man taking days to reply can’t be scare off — he was never around to be scared off in the first place! Please allow MEN to progress the relationship / interactions especially in the early stages of meeting. They want the chase and to win you. Forget you ever even talked to this guy. He has made it evident he is not interested.
Sensy
Just lean back and do nothing…you want him to chase YOU.
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