Did I text too much?

Yeah, I’ll tell ya what I can in a public forum….

Mine has been a player all his adult life…heck he probably started right after puberty! When he did get married, he stayed married for many years but, he had some affairs in between and it was mostly a marriage of convenience…he used to travel a lot…then he finally got divorced and moved to the city that I’m in. We live in the same complex.

Mr. Player saw me as someone he could be FWB with for a while until he got tired of the sex and then expected me to be the “typical” woman, blow up his phone, get mad, cry, drink, get crazy again and beat up on his door, etc., etc.

I didn’t react to the FWB thing as he expected. First I never agreed or disagreed to anything. I just told him “let’s see where this goes…” that drove him nuts. Then I didn’t initiate contact with him except rarely. He still had to test me…there was another issue that came up in the middle of all of this which changed the dynamics a little bit but instead of having him get rid of me (which was the intention of this other person), it ended up making him fall harder for me because he started to really miss the sex with me and started sneaking over to my place.

I allowed it because for one thing, I wanted the sex and I didn’t really care if it ended up being only an FWB…it is that great between us….and secondly, letting him get his fill once every 8-10 days kept him hooked and coming back for more, so much so that he finally did get the backbone to tell that person to eff-off and now he’s all boyfriendy…but, during the time that he had to sneak over here, I made sure I did the random pattern of answering his texts and boy, did he start finding ways to sneak over more and more often…then he started to come over and actually just hang out with me and my son….it’s now actually totally back to normal with him introducing me to his close friends here (family is too far away) and taking me out on real dates. :)

Wow Mistral, well played, well played

Unfortunately for me though it’s too late. I doubt I will hear from him again, so I won’t get the opportunity to try that technique out with him.

“yes, i wouldnt care if he wanted a month of no contact, all i ask is that he SAYS SO, like a normal person, and dont leave me guessing!”

He is not leaving you guessing. He is saying: “I am busy, tired, worn out (insert any other adjective of your liking) I don’t care if I ever talk to you again, and I am sure as F am not texting her back. Not after this.”

Hey Good Dancer,

I’m SURE you’ll hear from him again. He might hold out for a month or so, but definitely within the next 2 months you’ll hear from him. And Newbie is absolutely right…it’ll be a “lame-o” “Hi, how’s it going?” text.

I wouldn’t make him wait 3 days, but I would make him wait a couple hours before texting back a simple “good, but busy.” and leave it at that…just those 3 words…nothing more!

You don’t make him or his texts a priority since he didn’t make you a priority first. When he gets over his foolish pride and actually texts you something of substance such as “I would like to talk about us, I still want us to see if it can work”, THEN you still take a few minutes to answer his text, but you do give him more of your attention at that point.

Look at it this way: You are the Mountain. He is Mohammed. The mountain didn’t come down to Mohammed, Mohammed CLIMBED the Mountain to get the wisdom and revelations.

Be the Mountain… :)

Ivy

I guess I am invested because we have been good friends for two years

The sex only started a month again, that not why I am invested

I just want a proper chance to say sorry to him for teh texting and go back to being friends. It’s unlikely I’d want to have sex with him again after this.

Nah really, Reader, how can i trust him after he just vanishes?

Yep….sounds like emotional shutdown. Just give him his space…he’ll be back…

Yeah Mistral

I am hoping it is just emotional shutdown and he will be back. I would hate to think my “worried” texts have chased him away

But it had been a week, and people get reported to missing persons after 12 hours. Two cases like that here in the news this week

i was just worried.

I believe both this and your other post are made up good dancer.

Good dancer

JUST IGNORE MARIA, SHE’S A RETARD.

Pls ladies let’s all be amicable.

This whole thread is ridiculous.

Reporting a guy as missing cause he doesn’t text you back after a hook up (and by the way there is no 12 hour rule)… comparing it to missing person stories on TV… and calling it all a “torturous situation”…

Please. Stop. Joking.