Does waiting for a guy to text you really work in your favor?

If a guy really likes you, he will initiating contact, period. If he’s not, he’s not that into you. In the early stages of dating, it’s very important for the woman to lay low and observe the guys behavior and also date others as well. Because I guarantee you he his.

Also, if a guy really likes you, you won’t find yourself questioning where you stand with him all the time. He will let it be known that he’s into you through his ACTIONS (calling you, seeing you regularly on formal dates) and not WORDS (texting, emails, etc).

And it doesn’t take long for a man to figure out his intentions with you either. They pretty much know right off the bat if you’re going to be just a friend, FWB, or a potential girlfriend. So all this crap about “I don’t know what I want” is just that CRAP. When a guy says that, that’s the woman’s cue to disappear, and date someone who DOES know what he wants.

Dating is supposed to be fun, enjoyable, and care free. Don’t go into it with high expectations and think that every guy you date is going to be your future husband. You’re only meant to be with one person and you’re going to go through a bunch of toads before you meet him. Have fun, be spontaneous, and you will attract the right man :)

I have to say yes it does work. When I started dating again, the first few guys I’d initiate contact as often as they did and they seemed to lose interest really quickly. After a few dates going nowhere I started following the advice, and almost all of the guys I dated after that wanted to see more of me (one or two there was obviously no chemistry but the rest kept trying).

V is correct, treat dating as a fun process. I started to look at it as meeting potential new friends with possibilities rather than dating, that way I was evaluating guys and whether I wanted them in my life on any level, rather than the possible “love of my life” or potential boyfriends. That stopped me getting emotionally involved too soon, if they flaked after a few dates then they obviously weren’t worth the time and I moved on. I’ve been with my boyfriend now for almost a year, he says one of the things that made him fall for me was my independence, the fact I have my own life and don’t need him 24/7.

I am in agreement that you want to let him initiate.. at least a huge majority of the time. I do think though that there is a fine line between letting him chase you and not showing any interest on your end though. Guy I’m dating the last 6 weeks ish I would say I let him initiate 8-9 out of 10 times.

It’s not just men, it’s women too. Imagine you’re busy with other things and every time you look at your phone there’s a text from someone. Wouldn’t you find it a bit exhausting and annoying after a while? But if you didn’t get those texts in time you’d miss them and want to reach out.

It’s as simple as that! Men value texts and constant communication a lot less than women do. They also get more absorbed with what they’re doing than we do. That means tthey don’t need to be in constant touch all the time to feel just like they did the last time they contacted you.

Women’s feelings change quickly. If a man hasn’t been exactly the same over a period of a day, the woman freaks out and thinks something must have changed. The poor guy is totally confused because nothing has changed for him.

I’ve read rubbish about “even the US President has time to send a text”. I’m sure he does. But I’m also sure he has chosen a strong independent woman who doesn’t need constant communication in order to feel loved.

Obviously consistently not getting in touch is a different matter.

I’m actually curious about this myself. When it comes to texting or maybe even dating in general, for men is it more “absence makes the heart grow fonder?” Because I feel like a lot of women have the idea that it’s “out of sight out of mind.”

apart from that incident, and without knowing this was a rule to start with, I’ve always allowed the chase. lead, pursue or whatever. for as long as I can remember that’s just the way it was done. Until your both in a full fledge relationship then and even at that, I sometimes don’t call or text for days. all the while he’s doing all the initiating.

Back in the day before texting was invented, we had no choice but to either wait at a pay phone at a specific time, date and location and hope no one else was using it or we’d miss the call and his dime would be wasted.

And really, maybe chase is not the best word choice for this.. but pursue. Let him pursue you.

I always believe a man should do a majority of the initiating, especially during the dating phase. During dating it should be him 90%, you 20%. After a few months, maybe 80/20. Once in a relationship 70/30.

My boyfriend does most of the initiating. I don’t feel like I need to talk to him every day so I was surprised at first by him checking in every day, letting me know he got home ok from work. I respond but I don’t usually do check ins. I do text him funny stuff sometimes or to make plans to see each other. But he still does most of the texting/calling. It’s not even something I purposefully plan on or try to hold back. I’m just usually busy and I figure I’ll see him or hear from him at some point but it doesn’t every cross my mind to think of who texted who last or who initiated first the last time.

@Annabelle – I think it’s the fact that they miss you that makes them realize how much they like you…it keeps the ball rolling and keeps them interested. And yeah, I think men think about us much more than they contact us – my BF has told me that he’s thought about me everyday since we met (especially during the time we took a break) – and his heart grew fonder and he missed me more when he was away from me. I think if a man cares, he always cares, regardless of whether he’s in touch. Just because he’s not texting 24/7, doesn’t mean he’s not thinking of you.

I also think they see that their life is better with you in it – and they can’t realize this until they have time away from you. Read the Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus book and online articles – I also like thefemininewoman – men are very different from us and need this away time to recharge so they can reconnect with us. This is true from early dating to marriage.

I also think it’s the nature of men to want to pursue – if you fill that void, then there is nothing for them to move toward. I think it makes men feel good to ‘do’ – whether it’s pursuing, moving the relationship forward, making us happy, or providing – I think men are in their glory when they are doing things and being productive.

If we are in their face or texting them constantly, there is nothing for them to pursue. It’s best to let them do what makes them happy (be the pursuer) and appreciate the things that they do.

I completely see that. I think it’s the overthinking nature that women have that gets to us. Its like OMG he didn’t text me back after twenty minutes, he hates me or something of that sort. Personally, I know when I really like a guy I’m super impatient and want things to move faster. I just need to take a chill pill and let it go its intended pace. I’m of the kind that’s slowly learning to put the phone down and NOT get the urge to text so much. It’s difficult fo’ sho ha but I’m learning. Whether it shows any results, I’ll have to wait and see.

Yes! Never initiate contact with a man unless you are his girlfriend or more than that

Men compartmentalize in their mind. They like to focus on one thing at a time. When you call or text you are interrupting whatever they are doing.

Since they have not called you they have to stop what they are doing and pull out the “girl” compartment. If this keeps happening it gets annoying instead of pleasurable…they don’t need or desire constant contact. Men are different.

Women on the other hand can multitask. They can play a video game and talk on the phone without it interrupting either one. Women place contact high on their list to show caring and interest….men not so much.

Men like face to face contact best cause it might result in sex….which is always beeping in the background. Texts and calls will not result in sex.

So think about these differences and you tell me if a guy is dying for you to text him?