Ex and I caught feelings after 4 years no contact and are both in relationship

My ex (36M) and I (35F) were together for 4 years on and off and had a very toxic relationship. We loved each other immensely, but fought all the time and brought out the very worst in each other.
The main issue was that I needed more from him than he was able to give, since I’ve got an anxious attachment style and he’s got an avoidant attachment.
Even though it wasn’t working, it took us both a long time before we were able to let each other go.

We went no contact for 5 years after we broke up and deleted each other on social media as well.
I spent the past years still being angry at him, but lately I have worked on myself a lot and that anger has lifted. Since recently I am finally able to see my own mistakes that contributed to the toxicity all those years ago.
I decided to contact him again after all these years because I was hoping to get some type of closure since we split up in a huge fight and it still bothered me a little bit from time to time. I thought maybe having a friendly conversation might help with that.
He was happy to hear from me and replied back in a very friendly manner.
It’s been a month now and we have been talking nonstop and even met up twice for coffee. The chemistry between us is insane, just like it was at the very beginning when hell hadn’t broken loose yet. We both are very confused and have some kind of feelings for each other again, even though we’re both in serious relationships that we are both content with.

I have worked hard on myself and my insecurities since then and have grown a lot. I don’t want to self sabotage by going any further with this because I realize this might be trauma love and the intense feelings are based on chaos. But these feelings seem so genuine and I keep thinking maybe this time it might actually work. I have grown a lot and became a lot more mature and a lot less anxious, which makes me think this time we might be a better fit.

I know the best thing would be to cut all contact again, especially because I feel very bad for our partners and don’t want to cheat on them. But I just can’t resist talking to him and I think about him every second of the day. I’m afraid I’ll ruin my relationship for no reason.

Am I being crazy or could this be true love?