Home › Forums › Complicated Situation / Mixed Signals › Ex – Meet Up
- This topic has 5 replies and was last updated 4 years, 11 months ago by
Khadija.
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Ella
My ex and I separated last summer. He broke up with me. Tried again in the autumn and I left. I deeply loved him but he hadn’t changed. We didn’t speak or text aside from petty jabs that we could have avoided.
We didn’t speak for nearly 4 months. Then he rang and was on about a car salesman who he knows knows me asking if the guy was gonna rip him off. I was like no don’t be silly it’s his job to sell cars. He then said you wanna catch up sometimes. I hesitantly said sure let me know when you’re free and we could. He said “well I’m free now”. For whatever reason I agreed.
His first words were “like don’t expect anything or have any expectations of this going anywhere it’s not that” when we met. I was like yeh okay. He asked me about work, life, what I was up to. Looking back the hour (I decided. It would be short). I was chill confident cheerful. And then said at the end “well I gotta go, glad you’re doing well” he did yeah you too. And I left.
Can someone explain what just happened? Is he curious? Does he want to date? Was he hoping I’d be a crying begging mess? Like.. I feel mixed because … I feel nothing great towards him. And it’s weird to feel little towards someone who was your everything once
Tallspicy
Who cares? And who knows? Please excuse the bluntness.
We will not be able to answer that for you and his performance was less than stellar anyhow. He is a man – he called to get an answer – you happened to be available. I doubt there was any more thought. He saw you and remembered he did not want move forward do he warned you. So you had a brief catch up, and you both went on your way. PLEASE stop overthinking it. I doubt he will reengage, otherwise he would not have put the distance of “don’t expect anything” to start.
Lane
If you ever want to know anything from a man, just ask him, as he’s the best and only one who can answer it.
It sounds like he was asking for your input on a car sale and for some odd reason randomly jumped to meeting up without a whole lot of forethought other than possibly gleaming more information on the car sales guy.
Its always best to ask “why” when someone asks you to do something. I personally would have responded with “why do you want to meet up?’ at which point he would have provided you the reason like did when you met, and them have the intel to determine if it would be a waste of your time or not.
Andrea
He’s just checking to see if you’re still an option in case his current situation falls apart. Anyone that can cut you off and go months without talking to you doesn’t really care about you.
kaye
Well considering his first words were “like don’t expect anything or have any expectations of this going anywhere it’s not that” I certainly don’t think he’s wanting to date you! No guy wanting you back is going to back it clear from the word go this isn’t going anywhere!
I don’t think it’s strange to be friends with exes. I was friends with several after we broke up and they would call from time to time and we would meet or I would call them and ask them to help me with something. I stopped all that once my husband and I were dating seriously because if I wouldn’t want him meeting up with exes and talking to them I wasn’t going to either.
It’s good you feel very little towards him. It’s a sign of moving on. As someone else said, don’t overthink it. Just continue to move on with your life.
Khadija
He already answered that question for you.
He told you what he needed assistance with, you agreed to meet, and he even told what not to expect.Please stop overthinking this.
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