Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Extremely Possessive
- This topic has 2 replies and was last updated 3 years, 6 months ago by
Raven.
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Al
Hi! I am 20 years old and this is my second relationship. I’ve dated my boyfriend for a year and everything is very sweet and nice. But for the past few months, he is being very possessive and in the beginning it felt sweet but it’s got to a point where I don’t know what to do.
I have 4 brothers and I am the youngest so ever since I was young, I was always with my brothers and their friends. I have a very few female friends and I was very comfortable around boys. I am also a bit of a tomboy.
I have a lot of guy friends and we hang out very often but I knew that my boyfriend might not like it so I did reduce the outings and sleepovers. But they have been my friends for years so I just can’t stop contacting them. He gets jealous about every interaction and always doubts that one of them has a crush on me, which is not true. I love my boyfriend and I want him to feel that, but no matter what I do it doesn’t seem enough for him. He doesn’t like my friends and now my friends are tired of putting up with him. I can’t just choose one, both are equally important.
Everything was good but whenever something relating to my friends come up, he becomes sullen and I feel that he is being extremely childish about this, since I’ve already told him that there is nothing going on.
What do I do to make him feel better?AngieBaby
Sweetie, I doubt you’re going to want to hear this, but it’s time to dump this guy. That’s not the right question to be asking. There’s nothing you can or should do to make him feel better about you being with a friends. He’s not an emotionally healthy person. In good relationships both parties have friends they spend time with. This is not going to get better, it will get worse when he realizes he can’t control you. And I don’t want to alarm you, but men like this can get violent.
You should be asking if being with this man is in your best interest, always. Learn this at a young age – have your standards. Watch a guy closely the first 90 days to see if he meets them. If he doesn’t or if he does things early on that are red flags, you walk away and you don’t look back. Don’t feel sorry for men and try to fix what’s broken in them. As others say here, don’t date on potential.
I”m glad you’re not getting rid of your friends on his say so now choose YOU and move on from this man before it turns toxic or dangerous.
Raven
Is this how you want your life? Some guy always telling you what to do, who you can spend your time with? Becoming ‘sullen’ when he doesn’t get his way?
He is jealous, controlling & manipulative… Abusive is the next step.
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