Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Feels like the universe is keeping us apart
- This topic has 7 replies and was last updated 4 years, 8 months ago by
Lane.
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Molly
I’ve written on here before about my FWB turning into something more. We’ve actually been doing really well so far and are exclusive as of now. It’s a step in the right direction and I can really see us ending up together. However, I feel like there’s always something happening to us. This is a complex situation so I’ll try to explain it as concisely and best as I can. We’re both in college and live at home with our parents. My parents are very strict and certain circumstances which I won’t go into keep me from seeing him as much as I want. It’s the classic “forbidden love” type thing. I know it sounds cliche and maybe even stupid to some of you but I know it can work between us. It’s a gut feeling.
cupcake
No one is going to be able to give you any advise unless you give more details. Forbidden love? How? Why? What keeps you apart? Why does it matter what your parents think. You aren’t a minor ( im guessing since you are at college).
Molly
Cupcake,
I am not a minor but I still currently live under my parents roof so I have to respect their rules which include no dating. I know I’m grown but that’s just the way my family is, there’s nothing I can do about it. I tried having a talk with them, it didn’t work. It’s hard to see him because I always have to lie about where I’m going and who I’m with. Sometimes I’ll just leave without permission because I feel like I’m pushed to that point but it’s straining my relationship with my family and I just don’t know what to do. I feel like I have to choose either or but I want both in my life.
cupcake
So how did you manage the FWB situation? Your parents have no right to prohibit you, a legal adult, from dating. And they have no right to tell you need permission to leave the house. That is really unhealthy and controlling. If i were you id find a way to move out of the house asap. Your relationship with them might be strained for a while and it might be difficult financially, but much better than being a prisoner. How long till you finish college?
cc
I can feel you very much. You have to go your own way in life. In the end you live for yourself not your parents. I think the only way to get out of this situation, is to confront them with facts and maybe starting by telling them you’ve met someone. Even if its only a friend. If you handle this gentle they sure will be understanding. Maybe even try to get him to meet your parents (first as a friend) so you two can hang out more. Honesty is much better, trust me. Because once thex find out, you will loose their trust and that’s not what you want at this point.
cupcake
Oh and i don’t think you need to chose either him or your family. I think you should chose YOU! You are a free individual with rights and you need to put yourself and your needs before those of your family.
Molly
I already tried having a talk with them, it didn’t work. I’ve accepted that while under my parents roof I’ll have to abide by their rules no matter how unfair it is. The good need is that I am finally moving out for college in August because I am transferring to a school a little farther away. So the advice I’m asking is how do I manage until then? It’s only 3 months. I don’t know if that’s a lot or I’m just being hopeful.
Lane
Three months will go by quickly. How far away though? It seems like your trading distance for freedom, and may end up being too far away for it to work with this guy if you have a few years to finish college.
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