GF slept with someone while we were seeing eachother

You should drop it because you’re not entitled to that opinion. Well, I guess you’re entitled to whatever opinion that you want, but you were not officially together. You dated, you broke up for a long time, and started dating again. In her mind you were starting from the beginning. You had to earn her again. Besides, what are you actually going to gain from having anything to do about this? She can’t unhook up with him.

The reason why you’re struggling as you know on some level that she didn’t do anything wrong. You were broken up for a long time and when you’re broken up for a long time, you don’t start again at the first date, you start again when you’re exclusive.

You were not exclusive when she did this. Sorry. She did nothing wrong or untrustworthy.

Let me preface by saying there is no universal right or wrong answer here regarding what she did. It’s all a matter of personal preference. There is hookup culture vs conservative school of thought. So it would be naive to label what she did as right or wrong.

Just to be sure since your description isnt very clear. To sum up, your ex slept with someone else while you two were dating again?

There are some who maintain the opinion that if you’re not exclusive, anything goes. As demonstrated by a commenter above. But majority in my experience would see that as a deal breaker. I would too. I knew one female friend who dumped the guy she was dating because he slept with her neighbour lol. Difference is he wasn’t her ex but that doesn’t change anything.

If this is a big deal to you, confront her about it. I understand you may be conflicted about how you feel vs how you should feel. But focus on the former. I dont know about others but no matter how much I’ve tried I cant convince myself how I ‘should’ feel about something, if what I truly feel is different. And so it is what it is.

Tallspicy, if that is your standard then that is -your- standard. Like I said, there are varying schools of thought and people are entitled to their own standard without being belittled for it. One is not better than the other because it’s apples and oranges. You dont have to get so defensive.

Anderson, everybody’s entitled to their own perspective but generally it’s not a great idea to make assumptions about something without having an actual conversation. That is why I am saying this and also I’m saying it about the first 4 to 6 weeks. He’s entitled to do whatever he wants, but I would hate for him to be encouraged to break up with her over something he didn’t actually communicate. People should not be mind readers. They didn’t just break up for a couple of weeks. If I ran into my ex-boyfriend tomorrow I would assume we were starting a date one.

I didn’t belittle anybody, I gave my opinion.

I would be upset… I think two people should be on the same page about these things. If you’re the kind of person who wants to sleep around while seeing someone seriously then you should be with someone like that. But if you’re the kind who wants to give it a chance and not sleep around then you should seek someone who feels that way too. It seems like you’re incompatible to me.