Ghosted… OK to ask for closure

I’m just going to ask what may be a rhetorical question.

If he’s ignoring your messages, why do you think he’d respond this particular time? You could send something out into the void and just assume he will never respond, have no expectations and consider that your closure? I just don’t think you are going to gain anything by continuing to try and contact him. In fact I think it will chip away at your well-being even more.

Ghosting absolutely sucks which is why I will never ever do it to another person no matter how hard it is to end something or how little amount of time I’ve dated them. Consider this his way of showing you what a coward he is and that THAT is all the closure you need.

sorry dear… :(

I agree that sometimes action is closure. If a man walked away without comment that is all I need to know…that is closure for me.

Friends would not dare do this…so he is less than a friend.

I hate ghosting, it’s just so rude because it sets you up to spend more energy than you should on a break up. The “break up text” might suck, but at least you have the score without any question. To me, ghosting is being abandoned, and being broken up with is ending a relationship. One hurts a lot more than the other. You have to realize that people who can abandon are trash/garbage/unreliable and no one to have a future with.

The thing with ghosts is that they don’t respond and won’t give you what you need. So it’s not really worth one more text. You might try a phone call, but they probably won’t pick up. The other thing about ghosts is that they pop back up. DO NOT RECONSIDER DATING HIM.

You don’t respond. You delete his number and any social media and move on

Yeah, it takes 30 seconds to let a woman know you are busy. Unless he is engaged in some crazy special forces military work, he can find 10 seconds for a “sorry babe, lets catch up later, work is nuts” message. Most guys who find themselves in that situation ARE apologetic.

I’d say that some people are OK with “breaks” and irregular communication; you aren’t. So good for you for calling it over and not trying to work it out.

If you want to respond, keep it simple. “OK, thanks for letting me know. Take care”. Don’t be argumentative, simply because being rude back just fuels them more to ghost. Being polite shows that women can and are kind in terms of break ups and hopefully encourages men to NOT ghost.

You got your answer there is nothing more to talk about.

I wouldn’t respond, I’d delete and block his number.

If you don’t he’ll pop back up and you’ll be tempted to give him another chance.

Shelley-give the guy another chance. But if it happens again-just leave it-one more chance is plenty.
I connected with a guy on line on a dating site. He asked me out and I said yes-then nothing for a couple of days. Then he messaged to cancel, as he had a family crisis to deal with. Said he would let me know when he could go out/meet me. Sounds like a blow off-so I did not pay that much attention,kept talking to others etc.
Well after two weeks,he got in touch,we had a great date ( there really was a family health crisis) and have been together every since-nearly 2 years now.
So never say never,but take it with a grain of salt for now and see what he does.

I know you guys won’t be happy about this, but we are seeing each other on Tomorrow to talk. I know it is over, but I think it’s something I’d like to discuss with him face to face

He ain’t ending it… He thinks everything is OK now and we are meeting to discuss where this is going.
I’m the one ending it

The sex was amazing though :-(

Update…He sent me flowers today at work?
I know they mean nothing, just thought I’d let you know

I probably didn’t give enough information in my initial thread. He didn’t contact me for 1.5 days. I last spoke with him at 11pm on Sunday and I didn’t hear from him again until Tuesday morning. It was a holiday weekend here in Ireland
He was working this weekend… He runs his own business.
We are dating exclusively… We had that conversation.
When he messaged me on Tuesday, it was at his regular time to text. So although I did message him first thing that morning ranting at him, he waited until he would normally message me.

I know he was quite anxious about the job he was doing this weekend and he is currently short staffed and the work is getting on top of him.

I know you are all going to think I’m very silly, but maybe I was overacting. 1. 5 days of no communication may not be a big deal.

I may also be niave, but I doubt he was with another woman, I don’t know where he would have found the time.

I think you need to really get your own life, after four months you are already complaining he isn’t texting everyday. If his normal time to text was Tuesday, I don’t get why you freaked out, decided he was ghosting. Threatened to break up. Complained at him. And had it in your head after one day of not hearing you were going to meet and break up. Nuts.this is why men think women are crazy.