Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Guy I was “dating” ghosted before our sixth date.
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September 5, 2023 at 9:16 pm #942496Robin
He ghosted before our 6th date.
I’m a 23F and he is a 55M. He has two children. 13yr old daughter and 32 yr old son We’ve been “dating” in a LDR for five going on six months. Last night, we talked on the phone about how we would spend some time together for two days. He started saying ‘I love you’ two months in the situation ship. I ended up saying it back weeks later. So, last light, he said “call me in the morning.” I said “Yea, you’re going to cancel on me anyway, that’s your m.o.” He replied “no, I’m not.” I believed him because I’ve grown to love and care about him.
He canceled twice before because he said he was sick one time, and the other time he said he was spending time with his kids. So, last night I mention that we should meet each other families. He said “we will talk about all that when I see you tomorrow.”
I said “okay.” We hadn’t seen each other for two months. I texted him multiple times asking ‘do you want to just have sex or start dating,’ and ‘We need to end this now if you don’t want use to continue to see each other.’I messaged him that and he continued to use me and say “I love you [Name], and I want us to grow with each other. You think I would say that if I didn’t mean it.” I always felt something was off but I just thought it was my overthinking coming into play. I called him this morning as he asked and he didn’t pick up. I waited an extra hour and I called back and texted “I guess I don’t need to come up because you didn’t answer.” I called one more time and he canceled my call. He didn’t cancel it right off but he did in the 4th ring. I sent him 4 messaged back to back—about three sentences a piece. I don’t care, I have a right to let him know how I felt.
I said to myself wow, to say I was upset and hurt was an understatement. I am not crying but I am very hurt. Being ghosted hurts because we were starting to developer something serious—or so I thought. I didn’t mind the age gap. I have no idea about his thoughts At first our situation was just sex and it developed–or so I thought. I guess he got scared and floated away without a goodbye. I guess no answer is an answer in my situation. It ended and I’m the one left hurt. He’s probably smiling and having a good ole day. I will recover just fine but it hurts.
Can you all give me some advice please? Thanks for reading.
All I can do is move on. I wish guys would communicate. Before you say this is nasty…. You can keep it to yourself, because I still love him and the wound is still fresh. It happened today 9/5/2023
September 6, 2023 at 12:42 am #942505RavenThat’d be like dating your Dad’s friend… iCk!
His wife found out about you.
September 6, 2023 at 12:56 am #942506AngieBabyNone of this makes sense to the point of I wonder if it’s real. Six “dates” over six months and you’re in love. It’s long distance, whatever that means. And you’re 23 and he’s 55 and he has children older than you. SMH.
Honey – get off the online dating sites and work out your daddy issues. This guy played you and you went right along with it. If you are this naive you are very vulnerable and online dating is unsafe for you.
September 6, 2023 at 3:09 am #942508Ewasorry but I stopped reading after you said you’re 23 and he is 55 with 2 kids.. go live your life and maybe start dating younger men with less baggage.
September 6, 2023 at 11:29 am #942515Liz LemonYou are young so I’m assuming you have little relationship experience. Any 55 year old man who wants to date a 23 year has major maturity issues, I’m sorry. He has a child older than you!
How did you meet if you’re long distance? Angiebaby is right, 6 dates over 6 months, and long distance….you don’t even know this guy! You sound very vulnerable and naive. We are saying this out of concern, not to insult you. I have a son your age and if he were dating a 55 year old woman (who would be a lot older than me!), I would be very upset. Seriously you should not be on dating apps if you are this naive. And you should definitely focus on meeting men your age, in real life, locally. This guy is just playing with you. For all you know he’s married.
September 6, 2023 at 12:28 pm #942517TammyHe was using you for occasional sex and just stringin u along! U got played by an older man since your yng and inexperienced. Anywys sh** happens. I think you shld just block this guy and go no contact. M sure after few weeks of introspection you will undrstnd and appreciate the observatns made by ladies on this post. Gud riddance i say. U deserve to date smone closer to your age and who lives closer to you.
September 7, 2023 at 8:00 am #942522RobinGirl, or whatever you are. I don’t have daddy issues. You think I’m naïve because of my age. You’re pathetic. This could have happened to anyone. I don’t date younger guys because it’s the same. Bless your heart.
September 7, 2023 at 8:02 am #942523RobinIt’s funny you think the younger guys are much better. What fantasy do you live in?
September 7, 2023 at 8:08 am #942524RobinYou’re right it’s assumptions. It’s also none of your concern who your son dates or screw. As I have stated before. Age means nothing. The character of the person does. I don’t know your age and don’t care, I’m your mind an 23 year old is naive or whatever. Maybe when you were 23 you were naive. This 23 year old, is not. I will never date “boys” my age. They’re trash. Some older guys still act like children. Thanks for your unsolicited advice but no thanks.
September 7, 2023 at 8:13 am #942525RobinI got played. You all are so pathetic. Your assumptions of a 23 year old’s mindset is horrible. You think a 23 year old is still suckling mommas titty. Ummm… no ma’am no sir. Not this gal. Yea, maybe those who had everything handed to thin and didn’t have to grow up fast. All this is is criticism. Good day.
September 7, 2023 at 8:44 am #942526Ewaoh dear…
September 7, 2023 at 9:30 am #942527Liz LemonI guess I hit a nerve ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
September 7, 2023 at 9:32 am #942528Liz LemonMultiple people responded to your post and we all said the same thing. You don’t have to take our advice. Keep doing what you’re doing if you want to!
September 7, 2023 at 9:47 am #942529AngieBabyLOL – right Ewa?
“Can you all give me some advice please? Thanks for reading.”
You posted here and asked, we answered. Hardly unsolicited.
What kind of advice did you expect to hear, that he’s a real catch and to keep running after him because surely he’ll see how wonderful you are and want to marry you??
The better question is, what fantasy do you live. No matter, you’re clearly happy in it and you think chasing men twice your age and falling in “love” with someone who lives far away from you and you’ve had sex with a handful of times is a winning strategy to create a lasting relationship. As you’re so wise and mature – keep going then.
Good luck out there Robin.
September 7, 2023 at 12:43 pm #942534ANM StaffKeymasterBye Robin.
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