Guy texts way too much!

Yeah, Bob…. I would not recommend texting her for a bit. Perhaps if you want to text her again, send her one final message saying that you hope she is doing well and that you enjoyed her company and leave it at that.

My ex texted me for 4 hours straight at the beginning and it was so exhausting. He revealed so much personal info and I had no idea when the texting would end. I had to ask him to just pick up the phone and call me the next night when the marathon started again. I was a slow texter but am super fast now thanks to him.

She probably got tired of the texting and figure if you were not going to ask her out, you were a time waster.

Call her and ask if she wants to meet. If she doesn’t respond or says no, you have your answer.

All the texting in the world does not mean you have chemistry. Chemistry is determined once you meet face to face. I refuse to non stop text win a man who isn’t stepping up to make a date. She probably moved on to a man who did.

Met a guy this week through a speed dating event on Tuesday and we had a lot in common professionally, so when he asked for my # and said he wants to take me out to dinner, I said yes.

He texted me that night which was fine. Then he texted me good morning the next day (weds) and asked if I was free this week. I said I’m all booked this week but said I’m free all of next week except Friday. He didn’t seem to acknowledge that because he never made a plan. I also explained that I was very busy at work and after work doing stuff, but that didn’t stop him from calling and leaving a voicemail as well as a few texts (on Weds). Thursday morning I got the good morning text, to which I responded. An afternoon phone call and then follow up text after not responding to the phone call…The second afternoon text I responded and said again that I was busy at work and cannot talk because of a work event going to later that night. He texted me again during the event. I did not respond. But I was highly turned off…It was a bit of overkill.

Obviously, he’s interested but being that we met at a speed dating event, our “date” was literally like 7 minutes long on Tuesday night and it’s Friday and he’s been blowing up my phone like crazy. Today ( Friday), he texts me again and I responded asking him how’s he doing and his response is him apologizing for all his texts and that he doesn’t want me to think he’s annoying..but he asked when i was free so we can grab dinner bc we have a lot in common. lol, so he’s self-aware enough to know that his behavior *could* be annoying (is that a red flag?)

Since I already told him my availability next week and he didn’t pick up on that, I don’t mind telling him again, but….I’m hesitating because I feel like he has already exhibited a lack of respect for boundaries (texting even when I told him i’m not around or available), and not paying attention to what I write. If we haven’t even made it to Date 1 and I’m already not excited, that’s kind of a bummer…

Being someone who gives the benefit of the doubt, my default behavior (which is used to accepting bad behavior) says give a chance, but there is a nagging part of me that says, run like mad!

I think I already know my answer. But I welcome feedback because I don’t know if I’m being too harsh or if this sounds too clingy to anyone else.

So I went out with this guy 2x and he’s really nice, but the constant texting from him is demonstrating he’s emotionally needy. I told him the beginning I didn’t want a relationship, but out of curiosity and his niceness I decided to just give it a chance. Again we have only hung out 2x and he texts me every single day! It’s annoying to me! I’m very independent and I thought he was too: nope he needs and wants a gf so bad. He never talks about the relationship or romance or anything, he just wants to see what I’m up to like every second even when I say I’m busy with school or work. Makes me irritated beyond belief. It’s def a red flag the behavior will only get worse in time. At this stage I’m about to flip…and I’m a really nice person, just certain things like this drive me nuts. It proves he’s desperate and needy. Ugh such a turn off!!
I got out of a relationship with a narcissit like 1 year ago so trust me I know how emotionally minipulative guys can be and they disguise it well.
I started to ignore this constant text or say 1 word replies, but even when I blatenly don’t care he take it as “at least she responded”. I’m about to call it quits!!

This is hard situation to be in Jen! While a lot of guys complain about girls texting too much, many men have the same issue. It’s honestly a byproduct of our technology driven world. While you may not like texting a bunch, it’s possible he has had girls who liked this in the past (or maybe even demanded it).
With that being said, I’ve found most guys with this issue are afraid of being forgotten or ignored. For someone who likes textinng its great, but it can be a deal breaker.
I dated a guy for a year who had this issue. He would tell me it was rude to not respond to a text within 15 minutes. I’m busy and was raised to believe that being on your phone aLl the time was annoying and a bad habit. The first 6 months was okay because we went to the same college, but once he left it became impossible. He would spend the WHOLE weekend with me and I would make planswer to see my friends after he left. If I didn’t respond to his texts ASAP when he got home he’d call me in a rage, saying I was inconsiderate even though we saw each other 3 hours before (nothing had changed in 3 hrs, I had nothing to say!) It got to the point where one night I was with some of our mutual friends(he was working so he couldn’t make it) and my phone died. After an hour of unresponded to texts he called EVERY guy he knew was around and asked to talk to me. Embarrassing and clingy behavior which he justified as “making sure I was safe” After breaking up with him wHicham was messy business, he sent nasty texts to people calling me names that were extremely vulgar and mean. Then, would proceed to text me begging me to give him a chance. To this day(3 years later) I get texts from his every 4-8 months like clockwork “hey how’s it going, why are you ignoring me?” Just can’t stand being ignored!
This is just an example of how constant need for attention can be a sign of something deeper, not all texting fiends are like this but just something to think about. If he’s like this after an hour, it will only get worse. What you’re seeing is his best self which people try to be when getting to know some one. Maybe just tell him it’s moving too fast for you, and that you can’t give him the attention he deserves. Im sure theres a girl out there that will text 24/7 and enjoy it!

I’m having a similar issue… It’s not like hes not good enough, he seems great its just seems to be coming from a scarcity driven place and im really sensitive to that energy. It’s as if I can feel his anxiety or something.Does this make sense? How do I tell him this without insulting his character?

I’m currently dealing with the texting hell with a guy that is just as much a talker as he is a non-stop texter. I have told him several times that I do not like to be tied to my phone, but he is relentless. I will engage with him for 15-20 minutes a day, but anything more I tune out, have long since disabled any notifications from him and get back to him when I feel like it.

And, guys need to learn that it’s not that we don’t really like a guy if we are not receptive to their constant want to be in touch and to over text us – that’s not it at all, because I have had intense chemistry and attraction to a few guys that have made this error, but I have long since learned not to give passes for bad behavior. I do tell them that I’m not a texter and when I’m busy I do say that.

This guy just continues to push the envelope with over texting. This morning after a series of text, we both text “talk to you later” and then immediately tries to start another text exchange by asking a question. Meanwhile, I’m thinking: “didn’t we just say goodbye, so why is this shyt still going?

He craves constant attention, which screams clingy and possible insecurity. I cannot coddle grown azz men, while he’s nice, but nice is not a consolation prize for compatibility. Even tonight, I say goodnight and he literally continues to try to engage with 7 more texts thereafter – 2 of which were paragraphs.

And, don’t get me started on how long winded he is on the phone. It’s the same shyt, say goodbye and he tries to re-engage in another topic. Again, he’s nice, but if you’re dating for compatibility, nice is not the winning prize. In an ideal world, more people would use texting for brief and secondary communication; and not some long, never-ending black hole of text.

first of all, think long and hard: do you really like him?

If the answer is no, then put him out of his misery, life is too short for that stuff. If the answer is yes, then TELL him (respectfully) to text you a bit less. It’s a good test of character. If he does in fact cut down on texting (maybe not as much as you’d like, but to some extent), then he’s worth keeping around. If he gets all upset or says ‘yes, fait enough’ but then doesn’t change a single thing, you know that’s a bad sign.

Good luck!

Here’s my take on men and texting. If they are calling too and trying to get to know you on text, I don’t mind it. If they are just texting and saying the same thing everyday (i.e. how is your day sweetie) and then 4 hours later ask the same thing again, and that is literally the only question he’s asking day after day, that majorly turns me off. That to me is like “you DGAF about how my day is going, you are bored and just trying to get attention.” So I guess meaningless texts are a turn off. This guy legit sounds like he cares if he’s asking deep questions but I would say something like “hey, I get pretty busy during the day so it’s hard for me to text, but I have time at night if you want to call (at said time) or we can chat when we meet again.” If he still is texting you during the day and not respecting your boundaries, ditch him.

My husband was an over texter, he said he thought ladies liked it, so he text’- A lot