He asked for space but I didn't give it to him

Hi, update,
He ended up somehow winning back his original girlfriend he cheated on. So there’s that.

Chloe, when you leave out important information like you did here, it really effects the quality of the advice we can give.

He cheated on his ex? Well then you just dodged a bullet! Cheating demonstrates a lack of integrity.

Most people who cheat will continue to cheat unless one of 2 things happen:

a) they finally lose someone they really love and realize they are the issue, or

b) life teaches them other hard knock lessons and they mature enough to realize this isn’t the way to go.

Either way, a cheater has to WANT to change, and as long as they get away with it, there is no incentive to change.

I can almost guarantee he is still up to his cheating ways, especially if she was foolish enough to take him back. Had he continued with you I am certain he would have cheated on you.

This is the universe letting you know you got VERY lucky.

Well, even i did the same mistake. He asked me for space, i tried my best to give him but it was hard. I was still going back to him. I did this for like nearly a week. Do you think its going to get any worse if i start to give him space now after a week of not? But like i dont really know how to say this, we are not even couples but we knew we had feelings for each other and we have been chatting for 1.5 years. And plus, i have only met him once but that time we barely even talked.

Your non BF who you’ve met once in 1.5 years wants space?

It’s not Love… You barely know this guy.

do u all really think it aint love? Cause like he initially even had plans to do stuffs when he meet me. Just because of this thing he said he will probably just give me the gift as a friend if he feels he doesnt love me. But if he does, then he might continue being as he was. We dont meet often cause im few hours apart from his place. Like luker said maybe he does feel so but if he feels so do u think the things i tell him and talk to him would change his mind? Whatever i say, he will still stick to his decision right if he really feel this arent real between us? If he does change his mind just by the things i say the he probably doesnt feel like things arent real ryte?

So Lurker, do u think its better to meet him this coming may and go out with him? And in the meanwhile until that day, am i suppose to give him space or how? Totally clueless, kindly need yr suggestions…

you are not listening. Stop talking to him, your “relationship” is based on fantasy, not reality. End what ever you think you have with him and go find someone close by who wants to spend time with you in person. There is a reason you’re only seen him once, he doesn’t want to meet up wait you, he wants a pen pal. He probably has a girlfriend or is married. Stop all communication with him and move on.

Lala, we previously studied in the same uni but didnt go out together before as in we went out before but as a group of friends. after that, i changed uni thats y its tough for us. And plus, his not married or having girlfriend, his still single. Even one week back when he said he is scared how this is gonna end and all, he told me to not leave him. Even few days ago, he said he will never forget me and he ask me if he can come to me if he ever feels like. He even mentioned that if there is any single chance for him to regain back what he lost, he will start back from scratch. And also, its not that im not listening but im just clarifying things.

Oops,im so sorry Lurker. Well, like i have 5 years to complete my studies and he probably have 2 or 3 years more only. His one year elder than me. We study in the same uni previously but diff course and class so we rarely meet. There was twice we met as a group. He even drop me back to my apartment with his car once before i left the place. It was just a while though so we didnt really have a long convo that time. But other than that, we most of the time chat and call only. We even have mutual friends and i do talk to them often too.I have strict parents too so its tough to meet him often but i am trying my best to somehow meet him. And so we planned to meet this may. But before that, this past one month he was telling me he feels sad and things arent going so well. And also in between we had some arguments which i think would have made him feel more worst. And plus, he always said he likes me but he doesnt know until which extend and he also fears what if separation talks like whats going on now happens again. And also because of his bad mood, his not consistence with his feelings and i got hurt maybe so i questioned him if he really knows what he feels for me but he said not sure he said like but love not ready. He also doesnt want commitments now and i dont want too. For me, i feel if he loves me whats wrong with being close and see what happens later and if there is some circumstances that time which forces us to separate our ways we can just do it then easily cause we know we cant do anything. But like making this decision now and all,i dont know if its right. So due to this issue and all, i really dont know what to do in between before meeting him. Do u think i should give him space before we meet.

We’ve been in a distant relationship for 3 years. We’ve had several fights and good memories. After the last fight he said he thinks he is over with the relationship, then I travelled to see him. When I returned from the trip he said that he just realized that he still loves me and would see what he can do to make the relationship work.
Few days after that he requested for space saying that he wants to be happy again. He said that he wants us to be in a place that even if the relationship works out we wouldn’t have a repeat of our previous issues.

Do you think he has gone for good?