Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › He broke up w/ his ex. Got with me. Got back w/her. Broke up. Now back w/ me?
- This topic has 12 replies and was last updated 3 years, 10 months ago by ANM Staff.
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March 28, 2021 at 8:33 am #852573Estefany
He broke up with his ex. Got with me. Then got back with her. They broke up and now he’s back with me. He introduced me to his friends so does he have feelings for me now?
So this guy (30/m) I’m (22/f) seeing just broke up with his ex recently. He wanted to marry her but it didn’t work out. He met me, we hooked up, and spent a week together when I flew out to see him. 2 days later he sends me a text saying he’s working things out with his ex, that we’re just friends, and to take this picture I had added on social media down (from the week we spent together), then he unfollowed me and I saw that he added his ex back. Fast forward 2 weeks later he added me back on social media and saw that he and the ex unfollowed each other. He told me that broke up again the night before. Anyways, I flew back out to see him 3 weeks after they broke up again.
The first time I was here (last month) as I said he called me his friend and told me he didn’t want him getting in the way of me meeting other guys. Now that I’m back out here his friends wanted to go out so I went with him which I took as a good sign that he wanted me to meet his friends. So now I’m convinced he only said those things (saying we were just friends and not to get in the way of meeting other men) because he felt forced to by the ex and didn’t really mean it.
Here’s a little more back story:
We met through my cousin and they’re really good friends. My cousin is also really good friends with the ex. Both parties have confided in so my cousin so she has the inside scoop.
They were broken up for 5 months. Went full NC for 2 or 3 months. I met him months prior, no hanging out yet. He unfollowed me on IG when when they started talking again but not together. He was supposed to go be with her and her family for the holidays and then that’s when they went full NC for 2 months. He added me back and then eventually made plans to see him vday weekend.
During the 2 months they went NC I was told he was crying over her, making posts about her, 2 days before I flew out there he even made a post with her initials saying he missed her, bought tickets for a June concert because he knew she’d be there and was hoping to run into her, and even contacted her mom. So apparently he kept trying but she kept ignoring him. Then on vday, when I was here, he contacted her to say happy vday. I left a few days later and that same day that I left he asked her to go to dinner. This is when he texted me saying he was working things out with her, they had gone to dinner, and that we were just friends, stop making and to take down all posts about my visit. He was also upfront with her about me.
So while they briefly got back together he had talked about how she was going to be his wife and the mother of his children. So he found out that she had seen someone while they were broken up. He got really upset and angry about it and told her now he’s unsure if he wanted to be with her. She in turn got all dramatic and she kicked him to the curb a few weeks later. He begged for her to stay but she still broke up with him. The very next day after their breakup he added me back on social media, and 3 weeks later now I’m here. So I’m out here with his friends again. I do know after meeting me the first time his friend said, “don’t screw it up with the *ex’s name*, she’s the best you’re ever going to get”. So I thought he was bringing me around again so that his friends could get to know me better. So all good signs?
So yea, all of this was told to me by cousin and she and she showed me some of the screenshots.
So my question is, has he developed feelings for me/like me? I think a man won’t spend days with you (I’m out here for a week) and have you meet his friends unless he has feelings for you and it’s not about sex.
March 28, 2021 at 9:17 am #852578SophiaI think he’s just using you to make his ex jealous in retaliation to her dating someone when they broke up the first time.
Clearly this guy is unstable right now, and really into his ex. The second you left the first time he took her out to dinner. And although he’s angry about her dating someone during their break, he begged her to stay when she broke up a second time.
Then you go flying out again and now wonder if he likes you beyond just sex because you go out with his guy friends? Really? SMH
No. He does not like you romantically. He wants his ex back. He’s totally using you and I question why you’re allowing it. You’re worth so much more than being a pawn in his game to win her again.
March 28, 2021 at 9:29 am #852581TallspicyHoney, a man can do a million things that look like he has feelings for you and have none.
Why would you take any of this as anything but a smoking plate of crap. And the fact that you keep flying to him? With????
There are zero good signs here for your self esteem and worth. Dump this dude.
March 28, 2021 at 9:47 am #852582EstefanyI’m wondering if he likes me not just because of meeting his friends, but also because he we’re spending an entire week together. Who spends an entire week with someone that they don’t like? I can barely spend one evening with a man I’m not interested in.
March 28, 2021 at 11:46 am #852593SophiaA) Because you flew there.
B) For revenge.
C) Get NSA sex for a week.
D) To get his ex back (again).
All of the above answers work.I might feel differently if he flew to see you, but nope. You’re being used. Don’t be surprised if he goes out to dinner with her the day you leave (again).
Just don’t say you weren’t warned.
March 28, 2021 at 11:53 am #852594EstefanySophia,
Well I live with my family and he has his own place so wouldn’t that explain why he hasn’t come to see me?
March 28, 2021 at 12:12 pm #852596JessEstefany (Cappygyal), it looks like the 13 page thread you created on the other forum did you no good. You can’t accept what everyone was telling you there so now you are hoping you can seek validation on this forum. You will get the same answers. As others have mentioned on there, you have a very distorted view in things and seem to be in denial.
You are beyond help at this point because you do not seem to want to accept or even listen to what others are saying. Please do yourself a favor and seek professional help. You are just this guy’s void filler when he is not with the girl he truly loves. Sort of acting like his bandaid for the time being and nothing else. Have more self respect.
March 28, 2021 at 12:28 pm #852599MaddieYou’ve written about this on this website multiple times and on others too, where you’ve gotten hundreds of responses to cut out this crappy guy and ignored them all. I think you deserve each other, at this point. Doesn’t sound like anyone else understands the situation like you do.
March 28, 2021 at 12:42 pm #852602JessYup, and yet on another forum, her thread was locked by the mods because she kept giving different ages, saying he was 37 and she was 30. She is all over the place and keeps posting, hoping to get the answer that she wants to hear- that this guy chose her and is in love with her. At the same time it’s also difficult to believe this.
That’s never going to be the case. You were demoted to his own personal on call, mobile hooker. He doesn’t have to lift a finger. You travel to him and give him sex. What guy is going to say no to that???
March 28, 2021 at 1:45 pm #852611RavenYou’ve been ignoring the good advice, so what is the advice you’d like to hear?
March 28, 2021 at 1:52 pm #852615SsYou are sooooo right. Its you he loves. Keep flying out to see him because that’s clearly working. Anyone else who gives you advice to run from this guy is totally wrong.
March 28, 2021 at 2:21 pm #852619ANM StaffKeymasterMarch 28, 2021 at 2:27 pm #852620ANM StaffKeymasterEstefany / Cappygyal / OP: As a reminder, you were banned from this forum because you were playing games, responding in the same thread as if you were a different person. Also, you were creating like a dozen threads, ignoring every single useful bit of feedback you were receiving. From the looks of it, the community is pretty frustrated with you about that.
More listening, less writing.
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