Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › He hit me during sex
- This topic has 9 replies and was last updated 9 years, 10 months ago by
tania.
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VA
I’ve had a fwb on and off for the past 7 months. I like where things are: the sex is great, he’s fun to be around, and I’m not interested in being his girlfriend (I’m recently divorced, no kids, and just want to see what’s out there). I feel so stupid asking this cause I know the answer already, and I’d never ask anyone I knew personally so here goes: the last time we had sex he smacked me on my face. At first I was stunned but I was so into the moment I didn’t say anything. In fact, I forgot about it until I came home. We weren’t arguing, or having rough sex, it just came out of the blue. He’s never raised his hand to me during any other time. This isn’t something I want to happen again so how do I bring it up to him?
Sassperilla
Do you mean he slapped you? Or did he punch you?
A slap during rough sex, if you both like that sort of thing, could be okay. A punch? Different.
Was it an accident?
Did he say anything?
You need to talk to him about this. Unless you like it rough, but even then I would say the face is off limits.
VA
It was a light slap, no mark, but not an accident
Harley
either be direct. .why did you hit me the other night ?I’d say i was uncomfortable with it and would not like it to happen again OR…..ask him in an indirect way what type of sex does he like…rough.. bondage. ..s and m etc.
you….may have to part company based on this. myself I would not mind being pinned down or straddled or held roughly by the wrists ..but I would not like a slap in the face.
maybe….He has a bad temper you know nothing about…..yet !
Sassperilla
He might think you would like it, it might be an ‘unconscious’ reflex in the heat of the moment.
one way or another you need to tell him you’re not into it. Then if he does it again tell him you need to call time on the FWB as you are not on the same page with your preferences.
Lagirl
No.. This is part of rough sex. A light slap on the face is a turn on for some people.
If you don’t like how it feels just tell him.. Otherwise he will assume you are ok with it.
Sherri
I agree with LA. Once my fwb slapped me during rough sex and I told him that I didn’t like that …. he never did it again. You just have to communicate what you like and what you don’t. If you like something tell him so he can do more of that, if you don’t like something tell him so that he wont do it again …. its that simple. Don’t overthink or complicate it!!!
redcurleysue
Different people have different turn ons and offs. If what turns on him does not turn you on let him know. Silence means you like it.
You might also mention something he hasn’t done yet that would turn you on…bet he will go full steam on that.
Lily
VA
I kind of agree with red here. But i want to add sth too. Men and their ego…lol We don’t want to turn them off because we hurt their ego so the next time you meet tell him the things you like when he does it to you and then mention that you are not into the slap thing. For example you can say…”I enjoy it when you kiss me under my neck, it drives me crazy but i am not that crazy about the slap thing…”
this way it will not be judgmental or accusation but just a simple conversation.tania
Like 50 Shades of Grey!
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