- This topic has 7 replies and was last updated 5 years, 7 months ago by
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Viewing 8 posts - 1 through 8 (of 8 total)
Viewing 8 posts - 1 through 8 (of 8 total)
Home › Forums › Complicated Situation / Mixed Signals › He never initiates contact
melanie.
Ellie
Everyone says that when a guy doesn’t initiate contact it’s like the number one bad sign. But what if he shows all the other signs that he’s interested?
tallgirl
No other sign matters than a man contacting you and making time to see you. Not looking at you, not responding, not paying attention to where you are, not being nice when he sees you…. or anything else.
All other signs could mean he is interested, but he is not interested ENOUGH. That is the key thing to remember.
This does not mean you should be cold. It means be responsive and warm. Mirror him. If he contacts you, get back to him. If he says he likes you, tell him you like him back….
Ellie
Hey Author, he makes time to see me, he’s always the one asking me out on dates and we always have fun when we go out, but I’m always the one reaching out to him first…
Khadija
As mentioned previously he is not interested enough.
Pull back and see what happens if you let him initiate.
Its the only way you will get an true answer as to what his interest level is.
anon
Some guys aren’t big texters, so not sure how often you expect him to initiate contact. But yeah, it’s good if he asks you out. But if you are wanting to text all day…and thus initiating all the time, you should back off a little and figure out how often he wants to chat.
I dated a guy for a while, and he would always call me once a week, on a Wednesday to ask me out for the weekend. He’d confirm “day of”, and make sure I made it home. But in between, he didn’t communicate much, because he wasn’t big on small talk. A lot of guys won’t text or call unless they have a good reason (to ask you out/make plans).
Ellie
Thanks for the advice!
I’ll back off and see what happens.
tammy
I agree with anon. just back off. and let him initiate things. let him get in touch to talk to you, make plans. maybe you guys have got into a pattern whereby you take the lead in initiating or reaching out? making plans. break the habit. let him make the effort. its not just about calling you or texting. its also about him reaching out and making plans. back off. and let him make the efforts and see what happens?
melanie
What I’ve learned is this: Even the guys who aren’t big texters BECOME texters if they want you. A man will get what a man wants. Do not initiate contact for a while and watch what happens…You may be watering a dying plant…
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