Home › Forums › Complicated Situation / Mixed Signals › he said he needed space
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ItAhiA.
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Mae
Beth, 8 is good. You thought you wouldn’t make it this far, and you have. Keep holding on.
Beth
Why is every one yelling at each other
No I don’t have a big support system here
I’m looking for support
For comfortBeth
Mae
I want to reach out to him
I know I shouldn’t
@maria
Having a rough timeMae
Beth, because this thread has somewhat spiraled out of control, as Lane rightfully pointed out.
Ignore the posts you consider yelling or negative and focus on the good and sometimes tough-love advice that helps.
When you want to reach out to him, re-read this thread instead. When you feel compelled to pick up the phone, pick up a book or magazine. You just have to not do it, hard as it is.
Beth
He hasn’t asked me to get my stuff and hasn’t dropped it off while I’ve been at work
I don’t know if j should just ask him when I can get my things
Idk
I don’t want to think it’s overP_Asohka
Sounds like you just got on his nerves…since he said it’s not over, then don’t do anything unless you want to ruin any chances of letting him get his mind together. Obviously if it’s like a few weeks and you haven’t heard anything then I”d ask for my stuff. You have a lot of thinking to do yourself.
Beth
Hi p
I may come back and post here a bunch
I’m trying to refrain
No he didn’t say it was over
He said give me f#%%% space
I don’t know how much stronger I can beBeth
Been 8 days
Mae
Beth,
“Stuff” can be replaced. Unfortunately you have to take it out of the equation for now. Pretend it’s not even a factor. I know the fact that he still has your stuff gives you hope, but it will set you back and make you feel even worse if you use the “stuff” as a bargaining chip for the relationship.
Like I said before, try to replace every negative or worried thought with a positive one. It’s Thursday night- can you and your daughter cook something together for dinner? Play some Christmas tunes? Be present for her as much as possible.
Beth
Mae
Do you think k I’ll hear from himMae
I wish I had a crystal ball, Beth. But I can tell you if you don’t, then you know what kind of person he is- one that’s not compatible with you.
Mae
Beth, when is your counseling appointment? I suggest you print each page of this thread and take it to your first meeting so he/she can get a sense of your thought process.
Maria
Beth, you WILL hear from him, I can bet all my money on it, but maybe not this or next week. I do think however that he would contact you around Christmas, he would be a-human and also a total jerk if he does not. You are still in a relationship, not officially broken up, so..sit tight and wait.
btw..did some reading recently? yes? no? going to? tonight? lol
Beth
@ Maria Was that the gig txt your bf back?
@mae the 15th
I don’t know if we are broken up or not
I am feeling really weak right now
Really am :(Phillygirl
If he needs space, your stuff is probably the furthest thing from his mind.
He doesn’t want contact with you right now, so it probably didn’t even occur to him to return anything. Because he knows it means he will have to see you, and at least say something, even if it’s kept short.
If you reach out to him and ask to get your stuff, realize that will likely be the catalyst to end this, for good.
Rach
Beth – do not give in! Imagine if you did and didn’t get the answers you wanted? You’d be even worse than you are now. A week may seem forever to you but it probably isn’t that long to him.. Be strong you can do it!
Beth
I don’t know if it’s over
I don’t know what to thinkBeth
@maria
How
Do
You know
I’m sorry- I’m
MiserableBeth
I haven’t seen him in so long…
I’m sorry I’m miserable right nowCali88
Beth, why don’t you put some focus on your daughter and enjoy the season with her? Playing with children is always a good thing :)
Cali89
Stupid phone! I meant for my screen name to be Cali89. Sorry everyone!
Beth
She is with her dad right now
Beth
I just wish I knew if he hated me —etc
Khadija
Oh dear Beth you have reached 14 pages and still you are having this pity party.
Why is that important?
This makes me sad for you.Cali89
Beth why would he hate you?
Hate is such a strong word. -
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