He sent me these texts

Well, it’s pretty clear that his intention is to break up with you, which is unfortunate. It sounds like the two of you don’t have matching lifestyles, in terms of activities, free time etc. And it sounds like you are not meeting his emotional needs in terms of time available etc. However, it does not sound like he is giving you an option to change, he pretty much made a decision to end it and whenever someone does that without discussing it, they have come to a final decision on their own and it’s not up for discussion.

However, since you two were together for 2 years and a text breakup is pretty immature, I would suggest you tell him, you understand his text and respect his wishes but you’d like to meet and talk in person for closure. If you really love him I would in person ask him if there is anything that you could do that would make him feel happier in the relationship and make him want to continue being together. Then I would wait for his answer. I would brace yourself though that he might say no.

Sorry for your experience. And oddly you say he is busy too, so it’s a bit confusing but perhaps the two of you don’t make enough compromises for one another and then one or both are left feeling emotinally unfulfilled.

When someone in a relationship feels emotionally unfullfilled I think that is a bit more than drama, I think it means that the person isn’t that happy in the relationship. The person is just not meeting your emotional relationship needs, and this can be because it’s just not the right dynamic, or something is off in the relationship that needs to be addressed. I think you just need to talk to him in person and ask what is it that he can’t do, what needs aren’t being met, and get him to open up and then decide based on his response if both of you actually want to stay in the relationship or not.

He’s being a needy baby but he’s only human. Unless you’re just over it and don’t want to be with him any longer, this is a cry out for reassurance. Guys are allowed to have their crazy moments too. If it’s too frequent I’d be exhausted and leave, but that’s all depends on your preference

Yes, you can be sympathetic but I don’t think men say those things when they are not thinking of making an exit from the relationship, but I could be wrong, he does sound a bit impulsive. I’d just do the nice date as someone suggested and have a heartfelt conversation with him and ask him if he feels happy with you and what you can do to improve the relationship. He might actually feel something missing emotionally from the relationship or he might have acted impulsively at the moment.

Patsytshirt, I like your response. I feel that! I’m gonna save that funny text for future :)

Khadija….exactly my point!! Who does that?!

The only way you CAN know what he meant is to directly ask him. It’s not viewed as “denial” to me, it’s viewed as let’s get to the core of the issue so we can then decide our individual course of action. If you want to break-up, tell me, if not, let’s work it out. I don’t have time for baby banter and added stress wondering “what’s going on”… We can discuss this later like adults. But sure, I don’t mind appeasing you to calm you if that’s all you need. He sounds like a handful though and once again I don’t know if I could deal with this type of neediness but I also know that if I’m no longer feeling compassionate towards you and I’m instead finding you annoying or burdensome, I’d think any further investment in you isn’t practical because I no longer have that feeling of genuine care

And FYI you’re proposed response keeps the conversation open and on-going. You’re clearly eliciting a response and if you’re as busy as you say you are then you surely don’t have time for the text back and forth nonsense

Mine says ‘I understand I’m always busy but I want you to know you DO matter, but I’m trying to tell you in the nicest way possible I don’t have time for this right now, but I really do value you and WANT to work on this when I can give it my full attention. That’s just NOT right NOW’ Lol. Just sayin’

That’s correct, you can’t. But you can be more understanding of maturity level when considering age. Reactions and interactions speak volumes in regards to actual maturity level as a whole but I’d be more likely to cut a 17 year old slack than a 30 year old…

According to your hypothesis, I must say that we both are mature adults :)

Lol. This is just my opinion of course but I’d imagine that 2 years into a relationship, it’s not “pleaser overdrive” it’s ‘seeing as how we’re both working towards the mutual goal of maintaining a healthy, happy, fulfilling relationship, yes, PLEASE tell me what you need and I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure we’re mutually satisfied’ IF you’re thinking your man needs ego strokes from you 2 YEARS in… You’re with the wrong man. Appreciation, consideration, and the desire to feel valued are MUCH different than an “ego stroke”. Just my opinion once again. I somehow always seem to fall into a completely different mindset. Lol. But SERIOUSLY, NO absolutely ZERO offense to anyone!!! I promise, I’m all about different persepectives!