He wants companionship…what does that even mean


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  • This topic has 11 replies and was last updated 4 years ago by T from NY.
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  • #444092 Reply
    Kendra

    Met this great guy (35, 3 y/o son, sweet, fun, ) a few weeks ago online. His initial intro to me said he wasn’t really sure what he was looking for, but since his divorce was finalizing in about a month he was thinking companionship for now. We hit it off imeadietly and communicated consistently, to the point that when we went out officially this past week we laughed that it felt like a 2nd or 3rd date already. Date #2 is already planned for next week. I guess I’m nervous…don’t want to scare him away but also don’t want to get my hopes up for something that is likely not going to happen. Thus far he’s a gentlemen but still flirty and we still communicate very consistently. Thoughts?

    #444093 Reply
    Kendra

    Oh, forgot to mention I’m the first person he’s dated since his wife, who he met in college.

    #444100 Reply
    Rose

    Companionship means he’s not ready to commit and it will be a casual relationship with no expectations.

    #444101 Reply
    Rose

    At least that’s what I understand.

    #444185 Reply
    Amy S

    I agree with Rose its probably someone to go out with at weekends and go on holiday with and nothing more for now. Keep your options open and continue to date others. x

    #743768 Reply
    Andrea

    I always chuckle when a woman says she’s met a “great guy” and it’s only been a few weeks. It’s way too early to tell that. Everyone is great in the very beginning! He’s going to need TIME to emotionally recover from the broken marriage, and in the meantime wants an activity partner and probably FWB if you will allow it. If you want to date him anyway, continue to date others because he will likely be dating others as well.

    #743782 Reply
    Crisula

    It means he’s still married…run

    #743789 Reply
    Raven

    He’s still married.

    You’re the first person he’s dated ‘after’ his wife = Rebound

    You’ve been on 1 date.

    #836086 Reply
    Avesha

    Companion – someone to do things with, have fun with, go places with but not have to commit to. A dog is a companion, keeps you from being lonely.

    Men, they don’t have girlfriends like we do. They don’t immerse themselves in friendships, self love, healing work, therapy and time for ourselves.

    They move on quick, they seek validation and solace from women, they move forward and stuff their feelings, most of the time. They can have a companion without the commitment and not have to sit alone with their feelings.

    He needs time to heal from his broken marriage, whether he wanted the divorce or not, it takes time to adjust to live after marriage.

    As his companion you will listen to him, help him heal and be there to pull him through his divorce. In turn he will have sex with you, take you places and do things with you, but he will not commit to you.

    You are a rebound.

    Do not be a foster girlfriend. Yep, look it up, its a thing.

    #836095 Reply
    T from NY

    Anything less than a man saying he’s open to finding a partner or girlfriend means casual, casual, casual. Companionship means he gets alllllll the perks of a girlfriend – while also possibly acting very much like a boyfriend – but you get no commitment. Once he’s slept with you his interest will either plummet or if he keeps sleeping with you – you still won’t be able to open your mouth about your needs because that will all become too much.

    This is about him and his needs and there’s nothing wrong with his needs, right now, in the space he is in his life. Time is the only thing that’s assured to assist in healing. You just have to know what you’re getting into, that his emotional needs mean he’ll be looking out for him most of all and you will most definitely (okay 98.5 percent chance) be a rebound. No need to think about him anymore – stop everything and think about what you want, then proceed accordingly.

    #836151 Reply
    Raven

    Fabulous responses to a 5 year old post…

    #836165 Reply
    T from NY

    Hahaha! Darn that’s first time I’ve missed that! Hope it helps some poor boo

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