He wants to stop seeing other people but we haven't even met yet

RUN!

Needy, desperate, controlling, love bomber, who knows?

What healthy person wants to commit without even meeting?!

Guys who do this are usually fakes. No genuine man will do what he is suggesting widout even meeting. He is a love bomber. As in he will serenade and act as if hes soo in love and before u know it he will be gone just as fast. Pls block this man and do jot share your number.

Julie… you have get really good at screening upfront if you’re going to be successful (and SAFE). How old are you? Are you totally new to online dating?

Here’s a quick look at what a good guy and a good interaction look like.

Ideally, he contacts you, you exchange some messages on the platform. Within a week or two, he asks you out for a coffee or drinks date so you can meet in person. You meet for no longer than an hour or hour and a half at the most and see how you get on. You keep it light, avoid any heavy topics and neither of you overdoes it on the alcohol if it’s a drinks date. You’re looking to see if he meets your standards and if you feel at least a basic physical attraction. If it went well, he will contact you within 3-7 days and ask to see you again and set another date. He plans them. He pays. After you’ve been out 3-4 times, you could initiate doing something together, but not before then. You want to see him showing consistent interest in you and good manners. Behavior outside of this should be considered a yellow flag.

If he goes silent for more than a week and pops back up suddenly, or if he takes too long to ask you out, big yellow flags. NEVER ask him out first, that’s his job. There are lots of guys online who are in relationships and looking to cheat or just looking for some attention and ego strokes who will string you along for as long as you put up with them.

Guys who are too intense are “love bombers” and as Tammy and others have said, the hotter they burn the faster they ghost you. They aren’t real.

Screen out these types up front: Anyone only separated and not fully divorced or recently out of a long-term relationship. Anyone who is looking for casual or is “open to whatever” or doesn’t know what they want out of dating. Decide what you’re OK with regarding kids and then screen out anyone who is out of your parameter.

Dealbreakers during conversation: sexual comments of any kind, badmouthing an ex, looking to get into a relationship immediately, too much future faking, asks you on a trip, asks you for money.

Protect yourself! Do not give out your phone number, do not give too much information about yourself before meeting. If you’re going to talk or video, do it through the platform and keep it brief and don’t do it too often before meeting.

If you get a weird or bad feeling about someone, honor it and don’t waste your time or risk your safety meeting someone you’re not sure about. If they’re being creepy, just cut it off and block, no need to be polite or explain. Women are way too polite sometimes and don’t consider their best interests enough in some situations.

Someone mentioned being careful about meeting for drinks. This is a good advice. It’s very easy for someone to spike your drink with Rohypnol and get you out of the bar without raising suspicion by saying, she doesn’t feel well or she’s super drunk and I’ve got to get her home. If you’re meeting for drinks, don’t leave your drink unattended or look away for extended periods. If you need to go to the bathroom, finish your drink first.

This is what I’ve learned through reading this site and other sources and field testing.

I’d be interested to hear others’ best online dating advice and I”m sure it would help Julie and others here.

I’m 38 and I’m new to online dating since my 8 year relationship 3 years ago. I dated another guy for 7 months but I met him through a friend. It just didn’t work out. Don’t want to go into detail.

My friend told me to go online but was hesitant. I think what you’ve written is great advice to keep safe.

I came-up with one possibility:

Maybe this Guy is making the Claim that he would close the App with the Reason that you could thus be committed to Each-Other–as actually a Cover-Up. He would actually Un-Match you so that you would not later see that he would Up-Date his Profile to bait other Women. Guys can play such Games to get you to commit to them–while actually stringing-you-along while leading a Double-or Multiple–Lives!