His texts – Needy or just easy going?

Hey everyone,

I could really use some input on a situation I’m navigating with a guy online Ive been messaging for a week. We haven’t met face-to-face yet, but his texts have me wondering if he might lean towards the needy side.

I’ve been married for 11 years before and have experienced five other relationships. Through these experiences, I’ve learned a lot about communication, compromise, and commitment. I also appreciate a bit of mystery in relationships.

Here’s where I’m at. his spontaneity in wanting to meet up, despite my clear schedule for next week, and his liberal use of terms of endearment like “baby,” have left me feeling a tad uneasy. When I addressed my discomfort with him, he suggested calling me “darling,” which I tentatively agreed to.

Recently, he suggested meeting without any prior plans, citing it as a sign of him thinking about me. While I value the sentiment, I’ve emphasized my preference for planning ahead. He agreed, but I also encouraged him to assert his own opinions and desires.

In our conversations, he often mirrors my views on relationships and demonstrates a broad understanding of different perspectives. However, I can’t shake this nagging feeling that his agreeableness might indicate potential neediness when we eventually meet in person.

He’s expressed a desire for loyalty, kindness, and attention, which is reasonable, but I’m wary of mistaking my gut feeling for apprehension about commitment.

Additionally, he mentioned some points in our conversation:

You need to be patient with guys, sometimes they want sex and game playing.
If you expect to be cool the first time, you might make a mistake. A lot of men are good players, sometimes good men are between cool and disaster.
Don’t make the wrong move and decide, and nah, he’s not for me as some people are like that.
Some men deserve bad treatment.
I’m not Brad Pitt, I’m not perfect, I also have negative sides and don’t hide it.
People worry too much, people can’t be themselves.
He tries to see things in every corner, that’s why women aren’t patient with me as I’ve been single since 2019.
He also asked what I was physically looking for in a guy.

So, what’s your take? Could my gut feeling be stemming from fear of commitment, or are his actions potentially indicative of neediness? I’m genuinely confused and would appreciate any insights or advice you might have.

Thanks a bunch.

ALLYSA