Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › How do you pick yourself up when rejected?
- This topic has 5 replies and was last updated 5 years, 2 months ago by
Warasen.
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Sam
So last week I had a date planned for Saturday with a guy, confirmed Wednesday, Thursday & Friday. He postponed our date 1 hour before we were due to meet due to work overrunning & moved to the Sunday, he picked the day & time. We chatted on and off until bedtime on the Saturday, so I don’t think it was for another date. Sunday came & he text to say he’d be a bit later due to work again. So 1 hour after our scheduled meet time I explained I had work the next day and canceled. He seemed really upset/annoyed I’d canceled but I figured I had already wasted time the day before starting to get ready & didn’t want to be messed around again. I had a pamper and went to bed feeling meh, but in control slightly.
Monday came & I was due to get a response for a job I’d interviewed 3 rounds for including a (48 hour prep time) presentation. I even left an engagement party of good friends early to avoid a hangover to prepare for the interview. I did really well in my opinion (as best as I could)
I was told i’d be informed the next week. 10 days after that interview, nothing
So in the space of 6 days I had 2 dates canceled by the same dude + as far as im aware rejection from a job I’d worked really hard towards.
I feel so crappy, my friends say bin the guy off & obviously just move on from the job. But I’m interested in things people do to do this.
FYI I’d been on 4 dates with this guy before, so not a first date.
MYOB
Plan another date I don’t see the issue. Apologize and say you were caught up at work and ask if he’s available for drinks
Sophia
“So 1 hour after our scheduled meet time I explained I had work the next day and canceled.“
Work might have been valid for him just as it was valid for you. Good for you for setting a boundary.
I’d reach out to him now that your life has calmed down with work and the interview process. But if he flakes again – see ya bye!!
As for the job prospect, give it time. With the intense level of interviewing that you went through, it sounds like you are a serious contender. Companies often say “in a week” when actually it takes them much longer than that to decide.
And on the bright side, you are now well versed for your next interview, should this actually fall through.
Life’s all about learning.
kaye
When I first read this I thought this was a first date and the guy was blowing you off but then I got to the end and saw where you had been on 4 dates with him. So it’s quite possible he did get tied up with work and couldn’t make it, but you were the one who actually canceled on him on Sunday! Also, you don’t know if you have been rejected for the job as just because you haven’t heard anything doesn’t mean they’ve actually made a decision. But even if that is the case, you don’t always get everything you want. It’s life. Even famous actresses and actors get turned down for roles they work really hard to get. That doesn’t mean you won’t have a better opportunity around the corner though. It’s all about dusting yourself off and getting up to do it all over again. After all tomorrow is another day….
kaye
I didn’t write this. Not sure who to credit but I thought you needed to read this today.
At age 23, Tina Fey was working at a YMCA.
At age 23, Oprah was fired from her first reporting job.
At age 24, Stephen King was working as a janitor and living in a trailer.
At age 27, Vincent Van Gogh failed as a missionary and decided to go to art school.
At age 28, J.K. Rowling was a suicidal single parent living on welfare.
At age 28, Wayne Coyne (from The Flaming Lips) was a fry cook.
At age 30, Harrison Ford was a carpenter.
At age 30, Martha Stewart was a stockbroker.
At age 37, Ang Lee was a stay-at-home-dad working odd jobs.
Julia Child released her first cookbook at age 39, and got her own cooking show at age 51.
Vera Wang failed to make the Olympic figure skating team, didn’t get the Editor-in-Chief position at Vogue, and designed her first dress at age 40.
Stan Lee didn’t release his first big comic book until he was 40.
Alan Rickman gave up his graphic design career to pursue acting at age 42.
Samuel L. Jackson didn’t get his first movie role until he was 46.
Morgan Freeman landed his first MAJOR movie role at age 52.
Kathryn Bigelow only reached international success when she made The Hurt Locker at age 57.
Grandma Moses didn’t begin her painting career until age 76.
Louise Bourgeois didn’t become a famous artist until she was 78.
Whatever your dream is, it is not too late to achieve it. You aren’t a failure because you haven’t found fame and fortune by the age of 21. Hell, it’s okay if you don’t even know what your dream is yet. Even if you’re flipping burgers, waiting tables or answering phones today, you never know where you’ll end up tomorrow.
Never tell yourself you’re too old to make it.
Never tell yourself you missed your chance.
Never tell yourself that you aren’t good enough.
You can do it. Whatever it is.Warasen
If this guy ghosts you because you were concerned about your career, like he was, you’re better off with out him. It means he thinks more about his career and doesn’t respect your’s.
I had interviewed at 1 company, 3 times over a 2 week period. They said they’d get back to me in 2 weeks, even if it’s a rejection. 2 months go by with no word, in fact I wrote them off. When they called back I wasn’t sure who it was! I went back for another interview, more to remind me what this company did than them asking me questions. I ended up working there 6 years. The reason they too so long to get back to me was they were unorganized and it carried over to other things.
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