Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › How long to date before meeting friends/family?
- This topic has 6 replies and was last updated 9 years, 2 months ago by
m.
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Curious
I’m looking for opinions on when to introduce the guy you’re dating to friends and then also family.
I’m looking for either “x” amount of months dating or I guess even stages of dating.
To give some context to my situation. We text everyday, usually spend Friday night through Sunday morning together (and occasionally one evening a week). He’s not my boyfriend but at this point were not dating others. (I’m intentionally leaving out how long we’ve dated.)
Thoughts?
Xyz
Why is he not your boyfriend? No point in introducing if you are just casual..
What are you wanting to get out of it?
Tinks
I was wondering about the same thing, but not just for me to introduce him but the other way around as well.
Would it only be once we are bf & gf.
CalLady
I don’t believe there’s any timescale, although I’d certainly want to know the relationship was going somewhere first. I’d have to be officially BF/GF, and have to believe the relationship had long term potential, once both of those criteria were met I would just introduce them when a natural opportunity came up. You also have to make sure he’s ready for it, some guys see that as a major commitment and want to wait, others see it as part of the dating progression and not too much of a big deal.
Xandi
I’m kind of in the same situation. We’re pretty much together but don’t have a title. We just call each other boos…whatever that means lol but I met a few of his friends first… either the second or third time we went out, so about a month into the relationship….and ended up meeting the rest of them about 5 months in…and he didn’t meet my friends until 5 months into the relationship. And now I feel like he can meet my family whenever he wants to…we’ve been dating 6 months.
Miss_Aspiring
Interesting. I posted about a similar topic on this forum and got a different answer.
I’ve been dating a guy for 2 months; we’re not “official”. We have great chemistry and really enjoy our time together. His consistent words and actions all indicate that he likes me. He’s even told me multiple times that he does. We have not met each other’s friends yet.
I’m going to a party next weekend that several of my friends will attend, and I posted a thread asking if it’s a good idea to invite him. Several people responded that it is a good idea – or at least, not a bad idea. I’d thought meeting friends was a big step, but they advised me to treat it casually. So I asked him to go, and he said yes. He said he’s excited to meet my friends, and also mentioned that he should introduce me to his friends, too.
So I’d say, if an opportunity comes up (like a party or event) where your friends will be, ask if he’d like to join you. Act like it’s not a big deal. If there’s no event, next time you’re going out with people, say: “Hey, I’m meeting A, B, and C for drinks Friday night. If you’re free, would you like to come?” By his reaction, you’ll be able to tell if he’s “ready” to take this step; most likely he won’t think too deeply into it.
Why are you leaving out how long you’ve dated? I’m not going to judge you… it might help to get some context (like if it’s been 5 years and no meeting friends, I’d tell you to RUN.)
m
it’s really personal preference for both people. What would be most effective is to meet friends and family whenever you’re thinking you “might” want to become bf/gf. But I don’t think that’s usually how it works. Usually people would wait until things are quite serious. But the best thing, if it were more accepted in our current culture, would be to meet friends and family early on, so they can vet your partner.
If you’ve been together more than a few months, though… let’s say 6 months. If it’s been that long and you’re not bf/gf and/or haven’t met the family, then it’s time for a discussion and to be ready to walk if your goal is a committed relationship. After 2-3 months, most men who aren’t totally emotionally unavailable should be looking at bf/gf status
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