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- This topic has 4 replies and was last updated 4 years, 8 months ago by
mell.
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Julia
My new boyfriend and I have been in a serious relationship for the past 10 days. During these 10 days we spent 4 “days” together. Like, 2 nights we slept at each other’s house, and one day we went for a hike and another we just hung out at home.
We usually only text randomly during the day (he initiates most of times), but few days ago he went to his parents house to spend the week there and two days ago I asked him to call me on the phone and he called me at night. That was our first phone call and that went well ♥ Now, should I wait for him to initiate calls or it’s ok for me to set up a phone call again? We have been in a relationship for only 10 days so I’m not sure how I should act.Sensy
Let him initiate.
Newbie
Its a good time to see how serious he is about you with sitting back. There are so many new relationships that feel flat anyway and are almost always because the guy came on fast and went poof after 2-3 months. So i wouldnt ask to call again. You can send a funny text now and then (if he also responds). At least thats what i recommend
Lane
I would continue to let him set the pace before you start initiating because oftentimes the lady then starts initiating *too much* and the guy stops because you’re now doing it. A good guide in the beginning is 90% him initiating and 10% you as guy’s do appreciate knowing that you are thinking of him too but not to the point you end up doing it too much and then complain when he stops. One of biggest complaints we get from ladies in your position is they try to push the relationship too quickly, initiate too much, and then wonder why the guy stops.
As you get more comfortable with each other, you can increase it but do it in baby steps,
by adding one here and there but the moment you start seeing him decrease, stop, pull back and let him take the lead again or you’ll be back here wondering why he doesn’t initiate anymore lol.mell
I agree with Lane and everyone else.
You want to know that he’s willing to make the effort – and not make him feel bombarded. Most guys don’t message quite as much as most women, so what may feela normal level for you might be more than he’s used to.
For every couple it’s different – some might be every day, some might be every couple of days. What matters is that it’s meaningful conversation to you – i.e. not all about sex or just “how are you”. Slowly you’ll reach a time when it’s pretty equal, or maybe sometimes you initiate more. You want a man who is invested enough to make an effort.
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