how often should we see each other in the beginning?

I think a month is a very short time. He seems like he’s interested from what you are saying. When I was younger I would believe the same thing that he should want to spend all his free time with me. I’m in my late twenties now and my perspectives have changed a lot. Taking it slow isn’t a bad thing … eventually as the relationship evolves then it should happen naturally that you both spend more and more time together.

And unless you’ve talked about exclusivity…date other people!!!

Well you can go on an online dating site, you can join meetup groups, there are options. You’ve only been dating him 1 month. Only invest the same amount he’s investing in you. When he texts, you text him back, let him come to you. Just sit back and mirror his actions. Have you talked about what you’re both looking for? Is he looking for a relationship? Does he know what he’s looking for? Is he only looking for a causal relationship?

Hi Marie,

You’re in the “getting to know you phase” where a man is trying to decide if he likes you enough to POSSIBLY (key word here) take it further if you meet his requirements (what he’s looking for in a mate).

I prefer the steady Eddies over the fast freddies, because fast means too many chemicals are involved and it masks one’s ability to see someone logically, and when the chemicals wear off you find yourself with a lemon.

Just sit back, enjoy your time together, and try to suggest FUN dates like mini-golf, sporting event (favorite team), theme park, sky diving etc. because men DIG this sort of stuff and its a good way to show him your fun and adventurous side :-)

I totally understand the waiting game. I’ve been seeing a guy for 6 weeks now, we started chatting almost 2 months ago. We are just now getting to our 5th date. The last date was on my birthday almost 3 weeks ago. We live 1.5 hours apart (1 hr if he drives to see me). We text daily and have phone conversations 2 to 3 times a week. I have only called him directly once. I mainly let him text me first. Occasionally I will send him a text first, just so he knows that I am interested. I have never complemented him on his looks or overly gushed over him. I did while drinking once tell him that I liked him, but I have never revisited this, explained it, or apologized for it. Actually I have acted completely normal and blown off the whole event. He doesn’t always promptly reply during our text conversations, but yet again most of the time he is at work.
To get to the point, if he is interested, he will contact you. If he likes you, he will pursue you. The trick is for you to be happy no matter the result of the relationship, and conduct yourself accordingly. You are the only person in this world that can make you happy, complete your life, and make you feel fulfilled. To put any of that responsibility on anyone else is too much stress. Let’s face it, guys aren’t in it to be stressed. Hell, I am not in it to be stressed. All stress does is age us and create poor health.
Best of luck!!!!

It is not a game but rather it’s the different perspective from both men and women when it comes to dating. Before you decide to date, you mush already love yourself, by yourself, and only yourself. No matter what actions you get from your dates, should not be dictating your happiness or moods. You are only dating. He owes you nothing. He doesn’t owe you a text or a call or a date if it doesn’t fit his schedule. He has no obligation to do a follow up date. If he is in to you, he will contact you. Your only job at this stage is to show up on dates if you like the guy and enjoy yourself. You need to have had already establish your standards and boundaries. Meaning, you require 24 to 48 hrs advanced notice to for dates. You don’t wait or expect a text or call. And most of all, you date others.

Hi Amelia.

Sorry, but its hard to ‘undo’ a pattern that you allowed to become established by giving out way too much information, too early, and not in person (one-on-one).

Dating is about spending TIME with each other, sharing experiences, making memories, and learning about each other in different environments and situations so you can truly assess the individual, the one they are NOW, not when they were 5, 8, 12, 17, etc.

Learning about each others life stories is a small part of it as those tidbits are best shared during a date, such as seeing a kid fly a kite at a park where you tell him “I remember my dad taking us kiting, that would be fun to do” with a wink and smile—hopefully he’ll get the hint and turn that experience into a date, if not, you just need to be straightforward “did you buy a kite yet?” the next time you talk.

At this juncture you will have to rein in the over sharing, try really hard to leave some mystery (if there’s any left), by telling him “let’s talk when were together”. Men bond through EXPERIENCES more than words, so finding activities you would like to do together as its much funner and enjoyable than talking about yourselves all the time—men love to play, so go out and play!