Home › Forums › Complicated Situation / Mixed Signals › How to support a friend with a very sick cat? Give her space?
- This topic has 5 replies and was last updated 3 years, 4 months ago by Moe.
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Moe
I am a guy. Have become friends with her for the past months, we text frequently and I appreciate her and her time very much.
Although we have met online, we plan to meet for the first time very soon.She has been dealing with a lot, taking care of her very sick cat. While I try to provide support for her cat, she has told me she does not need it. Every person deals with things in their own way, and even when our chats aren’t consistent, I want to talk with her but feel like I need to give her space and not force the conversation.
How can I give her space without appearing distant? If they prefer to not text much, how can I be there for her?
Thank you!
MoeContinuing…
I have not been a good communicator recently, especially being long-distance friends..it’s something I need to work on and improve. She often carries the chat, and I feel really bad when she does that, as I want to be a good friend to her and reciprocate things so she isn’t carrying all the weight. She’s a good person too, so I definitely don’t want to lose that.
BrookeYou mentioned she’s the one that carries the conversation so maybe she started feeling like she’s been chasing you and has pulled back?
This probably has nothing to do with the cat.
Moe@Brooke
I am not sure but that may be a reason. At this point, I want to make sure I improve things on my end so that I become a better friend.
BrookeOkay. Well offer that to her. Since she’s quiet right now anyway, tell her what you’ve said here. That you feel like you haven’t been the friend you really want to be for her and that you want her to know that you’d like to be there more and leave it at that. Make sure you take actions when she does reach out for you as she will be testing. (Start showing instead of just saying)
MoeThank you for the reply @Brooke.
That is a good approach i think, so thank you for that advice/suggestion!
Is this something you recommend I do the next time I chat, or doing so soon?
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