Home › Forums › Decoding His Signals / How Does He Feel About Me? › How to wish Happy Birthday to a crush to give a very subtle hint
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Linda.
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confused
I like a guy at my work and my chances are around 5% (he’s younger and kind of out of my league overall) but according to one famous movie – ‘so you telling me there is a chance’? We do not work in the same department and interact once in a while.
His B-day is coming up and it’s weekend. We are connected in the facebook and there will be a standard notification so it will look normal if I wish him Happy Birthday.
My goal is to write it in a way that if he has any possible interest he’ll pick it up but if he’s not he won’t think to much into it / be uncomfortable or awkward. So far the best I have is just PM-ing in fb with the standard phrase and his name. If I do it around 9-10 in the morning with that is it enough? Should I add something else like a smiley face in the end?
Am I overthinking and this does not mean a thing regardless?Raven
Chances are, your Facebook Happy Birthday will get lost in the shuffle… [Last Year I got 300+ HB wishes]
You’re way overthinking…
If you really think your chances are 5% – please don’t set yourself up for disappointment… Besides, you wish someone HB without any agenda…
Danielle
Why do you like him so much?? it feels like you are already overly invested if you are plotting like Matahari to just say happy birthday. And if you’re smart… go find someone with whom you have better odds. And even better still, act like a girl and set it up so the man is calculating his odds of getting YOU and pursuing you.
Amanda
Wait until after his birthday – I’d say 3 or 4 days after. Then write to him. “I just realized it was your birthday and I forgot to say happy birthday. So sorry and have a very happy 3-days after your birthday :) !” If you send it after everyone else he will notice it. And if he likes you he will pick up on that message. If not, no harm and move on.
confused
I was planning to pm him and not just write in his wall… 5% chance is still a chance, I won’t be able to subtly let him know in person, just being super nice is not gonna be enough… He is one of the kindest people I know and just being nice to him is not gonna be enough and I won’t be able to flirt without looking casual.Again, there is an age difference and there is a high chance he’s not even considering me. 5% though is still better than 0%
I really think that if I find the certain perfect words I will know if it’s no or maybe on his side.
redcurleysue
How about saying what you feel. “Happy Birthday to one of the kindest men I have had the pleasure to meet. May your year be filled with joy.”
You have said something personal about your feelings but no too much. He will think it is sweet.
Google more sayings and quotes you think might be appropriate.
Shannon
Where are you getting that this has a 5% chance? It seems like you have this calculation written in stone.
And there are no leagues when you’re an adult. We’re all equal. The notion that certain people are ranked above or below others needs to be left behind in high school. Everyone has something worthwhile to bring to the table.
Lila
Agree with Amanda, my boyfriend wrote four days after my bday we were friends before going out and he got my attention, do not be so eager all about timing I guess
me
Well, if I wait we’ll be celebrating at work with email going out and he’ll get plenty of wishes that way later on. I really think I should write on his B-day with pm message since most people who just being nice will just write on the wall.
This whole thing might look like an overthinking but in fact it’s a perfect way to let him know he’s awesome but how not to overdue itNat
You are setting yourself up for trouble. He is younger, out of your league AND works at the same place. If you chase him and boost his ego enough he might have a fling with you, then what? Guys are very sensitive to women’s attention. if you smile at him and compliment him on something, like a new shirt, he’d get the message, you don’t need to go out of your way to plot things. Sending him a HB message with a hint is creepy. Just be nice and sincerely wish him nice things. If he is interested, he will initiate things, age difference never stopped anyone. if a guy likes you, he likes you. All you have to do is to show him he will not be rejected. Smiling and talking to him and saying something nice to him is QUITE enough, I speak from experience.
Crisula
nooo you don’t pm him first!!! It’s too familiar and you work with him….plus if you’re overthinking any interaction…. especially like this..it wouldn’t go well go well.
Just post on his timeline a Happy Birthday…put a fun little pic..makes it stand out a a bit….. he’ll most probably see it
If he’s interested..
He will contact YOU
confused
The last thing I wanna do is to seem creepy. Would just pm-ing like ‘Happy Birthday, John, have a great day’ be creepy?
Crisula
you wouldn’t ask unless you thought it did
but…yes..it would be creepy
Crisula
I work with Cold Cases ..I am EXPERT on creepy ;)
Raven
If you’re only occasional at work, yes a PM would be odd.
confused
We’ve been in the handful of work outings and talked…It’s not like I do not know him at all.
Lem
Just send him the PM. HOnestly I think you are way overthinking this.
He knows who you are. He knows how to ask you out if he is really interested.confused
In case he is somewhat interested / interested but does not know if i am that all might be important
L
Waste of time.. rarely works when you are the pursuer., men know what they want and will pursue
con
Unless somebody says otherwise the pm message will be Happy Birthday, John! Havе an awеsome day :)
Does not look too creepylem
So when he says ‘thank you’ and nothing else. You are good with that? I guess I just dont see how wishing his a happy bday is supposed to show you have interest. Men can’t read minds and frankly I think what I just wrote is the response you are going to get.
Raven
When I get PM from guys I don’t know well, I find it creepy…
What don’t they want the rest of our Worlds know that they are contacting me… Why can’t they just write on my Wall…
Algo
“In case he is somewhat interested / interested but does not know if i am that all might be important.”
If he’s somewhat interested, he will seek you out in subtle or less than subtle ways to find out if YOU are interested in him. If he doesn’t, he’s not interested enough for you to make an effort. Don’t chase a Guy, if he’s interested he’ll find ways to subtly contact you. Not the other way around.
Shannon
I would think it was weird. Why not directly wish me a happy birthday at work or say it on my wall like everyone else? If you want subtle, take Amanda’s suggestion.
L
Is there a shortage of men where you are?
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