I have gone no contact, but he needs my help

He got relationship benefits because you gave them to him. You let him emotionally dump on you. Just say, bob, thanks for reaching out, but I not available to help you any more. I truly wish you the best, and please do not contact me anymore.

This doesn’t require any response at all. He’s already been told you’re not available. Block and ignore. This is a pathetic attempt to play on your kindness. Don’t reward it. Any response at all, even one word, tells him he still might have a chance. Nothing says “it’s over” like dead silence.

“A clean break is not easy as he always has a way of dragging me back in.” – A clean break is as easy or as hard as you allow it to be. You are 100% in charge of whether or not you get “dragged back in.” I’m curious as to why he’s not already blocked if you know you’re done and you know he will try to worm his way back in??

Just so you’re aware, if you look up “text your ex back” on the internet, you get *scripts* for all sorts of texts and messaging strategies that encourage curiosity and a response so the person can create an opening to reengage. He is likely doing something like that, because at least if I really needed help from someone, I wouldn’t be vague about it!!! I’d leave a voicemail or some detail. I also would hope there’s someone I can ask who isn’t a casual ex if I really was in trouble.

So I agree with the others that you don’t need to respond, can block him, and don’t owe him anything. Especially if he’s shown you before he can be manipulative (emotional dumping on you, calling you a special friend while knowing you wanted more, vague reaching out after you’ve told him you’re done and broke things off … none of those indicate he cares about your feelings, so keep loving yourself more!).

I have not blocked him so that he can’t use other phones/ways to contact me.
Thanks for your pieces of advice. I have not responded to him, and from your advice, I feel that I can comfortably ignore him.
So far he has just texted me again asking for his jacket back as he has a bad fever.

Chloe, stop letting him push you around. Mail his jacket and anything else of his you have back without comment and forget him. So what if he uses other devices to contact you. You block those and say nothing. When he gets zero response from you after a while he will get the message and go away. People who sense you’re not done will keep pushing the boundaries. You have to hold firm with complete silence. When they get zero juice from you, they eventually go away. If they persist, you ignore. I have an ex who will text me periodically off different devices that he misses me and a bunch of other nonsense and I just shrug, block and ignore. I don’t talk about it to my friends or give it any thought. I broke up with him for a good reason and every time he reaches out it’s a reminder of why I ended it and that I did the right thing.

He needs his jacket back because he has a fever. LOL. What a bunch of BS.

@Raven, it’s the only prescription!