Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › I need an advice on a flaky guy
- This topic has 6 replies and was last updated 4 years, 10 months ago by
Amy S.
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Annie
So l’ve met this guy like 3 years ago at a party (I’m a F, turning 30 in a month, he’ll be 26). He caught my attention, we exchanged some looks, so I asked my friends about him, found out his name, what he does…. But that was it. Then we met several times after that, exchanged some looks again but we never talked. Until last summer when we matched on Tinder. We texted and agreed to meet, which ended in “we’ll talk next week” and nothing happened. So I texted him a week after that “we both totally ditched that but I’d love to make time next week, so let me know” and no response from him.
Then we saw each other at a concert in December, exchanged some looks again, I think he even recognized me from Tinder but I was there with my friends, he was there with his… So again, no progress there.We both work in the same field and like a month ago, I saw this job offer on a project from him in a Facebook group and it was actually the job that got my interest this time, so I contacted him via FB about it. We started texting (not all work related, which was very ok), we agreed to meet also with the guys from the company offering this job (his friends) and it was quite a long process communicating all that, because he studied for the final exams at the same time, so I asked him out for a drink as a thank you for getting me this project. He said “yes, let’s go sometime during the week after the meeting”.
We met this week, finally, and the job worked out. Then we took the same bus on the way home and talked for a bit, there seemed to be a pretty good energy between us. I reminded him the drink offer and he said “let’s go next week, I had a bad hangover this weekend and I don’t want to drink this week”. Ok, a little weird but understandable. And after that, nothing happened…
He seems like he’s not really into texting that much which I totally understand but I really don’t want to be the one to ask him out. A g a i n.
I still need to let him know about this job though, as we have some next steps we agreed on, so should I remind him about that drink as well? I’m a bit demotivated… :D Thanks!Ss
He isnt showing any romantic interest in you at all – he has been consistent in not showing interest which is demonstrated by your only meeting being about a job! I’m not sure why you are not taking the hint really … he is being polite. If he wanted to see/date you he would be making plans or even used the opportunity when you met up about a job to catch up with you one to one afterwards.
The only sign of interest is him apparently looking at you which means nothing and an aborted Tinder date.
I’m not meaning to be harsh but you are flogging a dead horse.
K
Honey, he’s not flaky… he’s just not iinterested.
This is why you don’t ask men out.
Liz Lemon
I agree with the others. Let this one go, he’s not feeling it. Definitely do not remind him about going for a drink again- save yourself some dignity. He’s trying to be polite, but has no romantic interest in you. If he had an interest he would jump at the chance to meet you for a drink, believe me (the “bad hangover” excuse is sooo obvious- he is not interested.)
Jo
You’ve asked him out several times (at least 3 and maybe 4) and he’s politely brushed you off each time. It seems pretty clear he’s not interested at this time for whatever reasons which may have nothing to do with you as a person. I really wouldn’t ask him again.
Khadija
Stop asking this man out!!!! You’ve done it several times and he’s not interested.
How are you not seeing that?
If you are interested in the job so be it but, don’t remind him about drinks.Please take a lesson from this, DO NOT CHASE MEN!!
Amy S
Ahhh I am cringing hes not flaky. Hes not interested. You are not taking the hint. Move on already you are acting desperate in his eyes.
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