Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › I scared him off and see my mistake, how can I fix this?
- This topic has 20 replies and was last updated 6 years, 7 months ago by
Torch.
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Kristy
I made some cardinal mistakes with my relationship and my bf started gradually pulling away, and ended up ghosting me.
I see now what I did wrong, including being too available, talked about feelings too much, and made some stupid texting mistakes (yes, I’m cringing but I double-texted and responded always immediately!).
We haven’t talked in about three weeks but we occasionally see each other on campus. I really think we had a good thing going, I just think I scared him off. Is there a way to fix this?
Raven
You want Houdini back?
Anastasia
The slightest hope on come back is always possible with a total no contact. You cut all communication with him incl. not enganging to his later “hey what r u up to, how r u” sort of messages, delete from social media. He might start missing you and trying to reconnect. However, I’d join Raven on this – this is a lost case and you’d better move on. In the meantime, reaccess your relationship patterns and learn from this
redcurleysue
Men are like cats…you chase them and they run. If you stand still they will come to you. Lesson learned.
anon
Why would you go back to a person who ghosted you for the “mortal sins” of double texting and being responsive with your communication. Also, it’s ok to open up emotionally to men at some point. You aren’t a robot. And wow! Imagine making time for a person you like.
Sure you were eager and he wasnt into you. That’s where a man a MAN steps up and tells you he doesn’t feel the same and ends the relationship. Instead he slinked off like a coward from someone who was just being nice.
He doesn’t deserve you or your love. Move on.
anon
And you didn’t scare him off. He wasn’t that into you. True love doesn’t require games.
L
Wow, doubles texting? Smh
alia
Congratulations, you’re human.
Forget this sorry guy. You did nothing wrong here.Vane s
Yes to all the comments that say you did nothing wrong here!
Do you seriously want to be with a guy like this?
With the right guy, none of this will matter. BE YOURSELF! I see no mistakes here. The only mistake here I see is your perspective, and you’re young, you’ll grow. So…next! You need to be someone who makes you comfortable enough to be yourself.
Kristy
so you think I should just let him go? we are really compatible. But maybe live and learn is the best way, I won’t make those mistakes again!
Danita
You didn’t make any mistakes. You take all those ridiculous dating advices way too serious. It is time to stop believing that you have to tiptoe around men and don’t reveal your feelings, because otherwise they will run away from you. And I don’t think that he is gone because you answer messages immediately or double texted. I do it all the time because I simply don’t care about all those ‘rules’ and guys I am going out with don’t mind.
Emily
I agree with Danita. The thing is, if the guy dumps you, he’s not into you. I know it sounds harsh, but it’s best to accept it and don’t waste time trying to win back someone who’s clearly not interested.
Raven
How can you be compatible with someone who ghosts You?!
Up your standards…Itsy
What you did was so trivial that I’m guessing he would have ghosted on you whether you did those things or not. These “mistakes” as you call them may hold some stock in the very initial stages if dating but not when you are in an actual relationship. If they truly are what scared him off then he really needs to grow up.
Pearl
test
Peggy
If a guy is into you-you could text him all day and he would not mind..more or less.. This guy is not for you,you did nothing wrong. Forget him.
Kyra
If a man is emotionally available and wants a committed relationship with you, he won’t get scared by what you did. I am not a fan of texting too much, still it’s not a deal breaker.
If he ghosted you and you don’t contact him, there is a possibility he may reappear in a few weeks or months but don’t short change yourself and wait for him. He ghosted you and that’s a reflection of his issues. You deserve so much better.
Torch
Kristy !
What’s your age ? & what’s his age ?
Did you get laid with him ?Answer the question above !
& let me tell you something baby ,
Forget about all mistakes you did , there was nothing wrong , there couldn’t be anything wrong beside three things –
1- Annoying us
2- Whining & complaining about the things
3- CheatingBeside these three , a man is okay with every thing what you do , no matter how stupid it is , we just don’t mind it ! If we love you !
& yeah the fix – You need give him the Silent treatment& to Just look hot !
That’s it girl !Kristy
I am 18 and he is 22. We had sex maybe 3 or 4 times a week for about a month.
anon
You can be compatible, very compatible and still lack the “love”. There is more to love than compatibility. Plus THE GUY GHOSTED YOU. That’s got to be the rudest and most uncompassionate way to break up with someone.
You really want to hitch your wagon to a man who just leaves without a word, for no real reason???
Move on.Torch
Oh Kristy !
You offered everything you had , & still he ghosted you , It means only one thing,
He didn’t seriously loved you !
I bet he is with someone else ! Or he’s dumb !Tell him your’e moving on…
I mean look dear , calm down Your’e only 18 !
Find a boy , not a man !
And now move on
Good luck ! -
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