I slept with someone else while we were casually dating

Hi,

Just wanted to ask for opinions on a current issue between me and my bf.

My bf and I have been together for 6 months. We started dating in May and got together in July.

Between May and July, our casual dating life went pretty great. We got along well but I was clear in my position that I’m not ready for us to be exclusively dating. He on the other hand made it pretty clear that he was serious with me and only me. We had plenty conversations where I had explained that my options were still open and that we had only recently got to know each other for me to only be focusing on him.

After we got together in July, I decided to tell him that I met with someone in June and slept with him. I told my bf that I didn’t want to start this relationship hiding things from him and that if he wanted to rethink his decision with me, he could. He was of course hurt, and we spent days afterwards trying to process his emotions.

Now in January 2025, he’s telling me that he can’t get over the hurt. He said he’s been trying to hide it but it comes to the point that every argument we have will remind him of that one incident I had told him about. He’s even more upset that after the night that I slept with someone, it was the very next day that I told him I have decided that I want to only focus on him exclusively. On my part, I didn’t think about how this had affected him I guess. I just thought that that incident gave me great clarity that I have developed feelings for my bf then and gave me the desire to pursue things more seriously with him. That was why I didn’t wait it out as I was excited to tell him that I only wanted to date him exclusively from then on.

Even so, in July when we talked through everything, he still decided that he wanted me. Now he’s saying that he can’t get over the hurt.

I’m not sure what to do to help him get over the hurt. Or how should I be feeling. I’m confused because his hurt have caused him to say nasty things to me and treat me differently than before. I’m made to feel like I should be earning his love back. Or should I not feel this way??