Home › Forums › The Community Lounge › I was his rebound, but I fell in love and he ran back to his ex.
- This topic has 6 replies and was last updated 2 years, 9 months ago by
Tammy.
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Karen
We were compatible in so many ways, but it didn’t seem to matter. I now know that I was only a rebound to make himself feel better, but I just can’t get him off my mind. I want him back and I know his ex really doesn’t love him. She is also twice his age and I know she is stuck in her ways and using him. What can I do to spark his interest and get him to see that she will never love him like he wants her to and that I would give him the world if he would only give me the chance?
Ashley
don’t do anything, because he will view your efforts as desperate. if he doesn’t want to be with you, you definitely shouldn’t be doing anything. it won’t help. he will have to figure out what he wants on his own. the way you’re thinking, that he’s a prize you need to win over, is a losing frame of mind. you have to think more of yourself than that, or he definitely won’t appreciate you at all. have confidence in yourself & don’t contact him, because he will sense your desperation for him
Lane
Hi Karen,
Sadly there’s nothing you can do, he has to want to do it as no about of begging, convincing or hoping is going to get him back.
It doesn’t matter how the relationship was or ended, its that he’s now CRAVING his freedom where the last thing he wants to do is jump back into another relationship! Right now he’s getting his ego stroked as it takes a huge hit when the relationship goes south, but its only a TEMPORARY FIX where eventually they will feel COMPELLED to pull away and start dealing with it.
It takes time for someone to rebuild their lives without the other person in it. I liken it to a piece of paper where you tear it in half, take one of the halves and tear it into little pieces (the ex), then slowly put those pieces back until your a whole person again without the ex in it. Its NOT an easy task, where it can take one (1) to several years to get there (took me 3 years) depending upon a lot of different factors, e.g, years, dysfunction, children etc.
I absolutely REFUSE to date a guy who hasn’t been fully broken-up/divorced and then single for a minimum of a year, preferably 2, just to be sure :-P
Sarah
Karen,
This just happened to me. Did he ever come back to you?
Feminine Energy
Their relationship won’t last, but if you chase him… he’ll never come back to you. He might one day realize that you were the one he should have chosen. But do you want to sit around and wait for that day, or would you rather date someone who is emotionally available and able to fully be there for you? You chose.
radomn girl
I experienced this, but this is how mine happened. So last year, this guy kept hitting me up. I didnt talk to him much. So, about a month ago. He asked me to hang out. Before i made sure there wasn’t no girl situation going on, on his social media. So, we go out and we had alot of FUN together. i didnt fall in love with him, let me just say that but I did really liked being around him.then about a week in he seems to get scared or something. like if something was off. We had been sleeping and seeing eachother almost everyday. turns out his ex supposedly wants to get back together and hes confused apparently. so we dont talk for a week, then we talked following week, and everything seems fine. Next day he acts weird. then i called him two days later. a girl pcicks up the phone and asked who i am. i asked who she is. she says shes his gf and he been laying in her bed all day. i asked since when. turns out they never brokeup. days later he blocks me on everything. end of story lol.
Tammy
Nothing to add here. U block him as well and move on.
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