Home › Forums › Did He Lose Interest? › Ignored Again
- This topic has 98 replies and was last updated 7 years, 11 months ago by
Ashley.
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Ashley
Haley, Thank you, today is day 8 of no contact & now that I know the truth I am doing pretty well, I feel strong again like my old self & I feel generally happy. Of course I’m still hurt & everything but each time I get my heart broken I find I bounce back quicker & quicker. And nothing against the girl/girls, not trying to sound rude or conceited but they have nothing on me lol not in beauty & certainly not in class. What he loved about me is how I dress elegantly yet sexy at the same time, without showing skin. And like someone said the other day, they are definitely cheap. I look more beautiful rolling out of bed than what he was “showing off” lol
Hannah, Thank you so much. I feel so bad for your friend, I hope she finds some sort of happiness. That is so sad. Yes the saying “Rejection is God’s protection” ..I could be being spared of a lot more disrespect right now without evening knowing it. Yes I agree, no dating! My best male friend treats me like gold & goes above & beyond to make me happy in general, just true friendship is the only kind of male companionship I’m seeking. I am repulsed by male attention of the “sexy” sort, it’s really irritating me & turning me off, I’ve been shutting all that down left & right. I just want fall out of love with him asap.
Haley, I just now looked at that blog you recommended the other day, post male syndrome, I love it! Thank you :)
Haley
Awesome, I’m glad you looked into it. Also, look into the other one, Baggage Reclaim, at her lists of posts. You will learn a lot, you will see your situation in many of her posts. Good luck, you got this!
Lisa
Haley wrote
“This guy really is unbelievable! If he really has to try this hard to make it look like his life is all that “Hey look at me the coolest Playboy that ever lived”…. it shows how pathetic he really is.
If someone is really that happy they don’t have the need to try so hard to project the image.”Totally agree
That aggressive triangulation on social media,
just makes me laugh.
Many insecure guys out there.Lisa, he’s really really short, I’m 5 feet tall and he’s maybe 3 inches taller than me? Not sure the exact measurement but maybe that’s why or has something to do with it. I don’t care about height but I know most women aren’t attracted to a guy that short
Melissa
Ashley, if you really, truly want to fall out of love with him ASAP, then stop posting here and stop talking about him to anyone for any reason. Look at this thread, it’s actually keeping the drama going and keeping his vibe fresh and alive in your head. Just a suggestion if you really want to move on fast.
Melissa, well I’m replying to those who have been so kind to help as well…if people wrote to me & I didn’t say anything I would find that to be rude behavior. Talking about things helps me & since the video I changed tremendously in 48 hours after I saw it. I went from not having an ounce of willpower to not view his story, to genuinely not even being tempted to look. I’ve made more progress in a few days than it would’ve taken me weeks before. I’ve felt happier the past couple days than I have in a year. I feel like I have nothing bringing me down anymore. So talking about it with other women has helped tremendously. If it wasn’t for these ladies I would not be where I’m at. If you find it annoying then you have the choice to not read my thread. Not saying that in a rude way I just mean I am doing what is best for me, it is working.
Melissa
That’s great Ashley… I never said I found it annoying, interesting that you assumed that. I was giving you a tip for getting over it ASAP as you expressed that is what you wanted. Whatever works for you – I’ve just found that at a certain point the less I talk or think about something I don’t want any longer, the quicker it goes away. And in my experience it works faster than venting. I’m not saying in a rude way, I’ve giving you a secret for the fast track. You’ve asked in a public forum for advice so presumably it’s open for all to chime in. You have the choice not to take it.
Sorry lol didn’t mean to come off as defensive or anything I took it the wrong way. I just am the type where the more info or perspective I have on something, it really helps me a lot. So if I’m doing well & someone adds something I haven’t thought of, that helps even more! But yeah I agree I actually tell that to my mom allll the time when she ruminates, the more you talk about it the worse the elephant in the room gets. But for me it’s more like the more input, the more I understand or learn. I guess I’m not at the point yet where I feel like I’ve learned all I could about this type of person
And why would you want to learn more about this type of person if you won’t want this in your life?? Would it make sense to spend the time learning about the kind of man you do want instead?
It helps me because the more knowledge I have, the more I understand what happened. The more I understand what happened, the more I move on. I know what works for me
Ridiculous
Just get over it. The guy disappeared a year ago and you jumped like a sad puppy when he gave you attention. Have some pride
Ashley, yes, it could be his height, it could be so much, he has been jealous all the time of your great qualities. Your looks and confidence and personality.
Sounds like a poor little loser.People who aggressively brag and triangulate on social media … my god … who are they trying to convince, really … themselves, probably.
He knows you’ll find someone hotter/more intelligent. That’s his biggest issue. You are above his league. lol, and now he can’t even reach you on snapchat anymore.
Ridiculous, that’s what I’ve been workin on 😉
Lisa, thank you for your insights, I do know that anyone who is happy or secure doesn’t treat people with disrespect!
If wrote
“Your own pic is all about superficial .. it’s not a sweet pose it’s a seductive one.”
Many men and women are jealous of radiant, sensual photos.
I have a similar one.
I intend to keep it that way.Yesssss 😘
redcurleysue
I am so glad you are feeling better. As for insight into this there are some questions you need to ask yourself.
What made him so attractive to you? Could some of these good points also have a dark side? Is he agressive or passive? Who does he remind you of? What does he have that your male friends do not that made you want him in a romantic relationship? If you could change a couple of things about him what would they be?
Redcurleysue,
He’s very intelligent/successful reminded me of my uncle (my best friend in the world, we’ve always had a special bond, I’m closer to him than my parents) he could see how special I was right off the bat, I felt this connection. The way he speaks, old fashioned like “the pleasure was all mine” sophisticated lifestyle, manners, all the things that reminded me of my favorite person (my uncle) … obsession of food like me, same political views as me, favorite color the same as me, also loved Hitchcock movies, he seemed caring like would cook food for the homeless on Thanksgiving for example.
My male friends I am not sexually attracted to while him I felt comfortable with him yet attracted. Guys in the past who turned out to be bad news, they made me feel this anxiety negative feeling but he made me feel this comfort like I belonged in his arms.
If I could change something it would be that he treat me with the consideration he did in the beginning. That he would be direct & tell me he is not into me, instead of hiding like a cruel coward & treating me with this disrespect.
Clearly the person I thought he was & how he is currently treating me, do not match
When I was in his presence I felt like I belonged with him. Just this lovely feeling. But soon as I left him the last time I saw him, the bad vibes came knocking (my gut warning me he was going to disappear & was instead spending time with other women)
For those who suspect he’s a narcissist you might be right, this is odd lol & has never happened before…
So I reactivated my Snapchat cause apparently if you don’t within 30 days your account is permanently gone so I’m like eh I’m not going to wait to activate it on the 29th day or something lol I want to use it here & there so I’ll just do it. Now that I know I have the strength to not look at his, there’s no benefit to having it deleted, I’m just not going to use it much.
So I was cooking for my friend, I always post when I cook something good. 3 posts: ingredients, cooking it, then the finished meal. She said when I posted, he posted 2 minutes after me & the second part of the story, he did the same. I’m like well the first time could be a coincidence but the second time is weird. A couple hours later I post my finished meal & she said he posted 2 minutes after me…again.
What are the odds that he genuinely just coincidentally happened to post 2 minutes after me, 3 times in a row. I mean come on. Seems like he was trying to bait me & see if I would watch his story. Nope!
Amanda
Lol don’t fall for his BS. He fooled you once, maybe even twice, but that is it. He seems to have little man syndrome lol. It is okay to be happy that you are driving him crazy by ignoring him. Next time a guy treats you like crap (hopefully there won’t be a next time, but just in case) believe him the first time. Anyway, brighter days ahead!
Pandora
Ashley, did he see, that you posted? Can you see somewhere that he or somebody looked at your posts?
Amanda, I sure will!
Pandora, yes he can see when I post because he follows me. So as soon as I posted, he did, 2 min intervals 3 times in a row
Julie, ummm not really!! I know he is not even going to even VIEW my story lol (he just saw I posted, he did not view them) I know he is not going to reach out to me so you’re wrong.
Someone doing what he did is not “looking into” anything it so prettyy strange, something that probably wouldn’t occur naturally. If he posted in 2 min intervals as soon as he saw I did, more than twice, all on his own, so be it, but that seems unlikely.
I just said I am not going to use Snapchat much so I’m not going to open the app every day & try to do whatever. The people who follow me enjoy my cooking stuff I’m not going to stop that if I feel like interacting on it once a week or so?
Yeah I don’t walk around trying to label someone as having a personality disorder just because they don’t like me. I’m not an idiot. It is his traits of seemingly having no empathy & so on that are making me consider it when others have said it. It actually does help me or I wouldn’t have tried to figure it out or look into it. I’m going to stop now -
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