Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › I’m scared he will find someone better, how do I stop feeling this way?
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ANM Staff.
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Stephy
I have been dating a guy for a few weeks and we are doing pretty well. However, we both work and live 2 hours away so don’t get to see as much, but he does make effort.
But I find myself constantly asking him if he meets other girls when he goes out.
And every time he tells me he is going out to a bar or party with friends, any type of outing that there’ll be girls I always get worried, I obviously don’t tell him.
But I panic and wonder what if he meets another girl that is better or he gets into something sexual. Now he told me his doing a road trip with his friend to different states, now I’m just scared he’ll meet a girl on this trip or have sex.
I know we are not in a relationship but I’m really insecure about him meeting other girls.
How do I stop feeling this way, I’m not bad looking at all, I work and have a pretty fun and good life but this is one thing that I haven’t been able to shake off and it kills me.
How do I stop feeling guys that I date would meet someone better.A
You come off as very desperate and insecure. This is an issue with you, not him. There is not a worse turn off for a guy than insecurity and they can smell it a mile away. This has nothing to do with your looks or personality. It has all to do with your self love. If you loved yourself, you would never feel this way.
If you’re not in a relationship he can do whatever he wants, including talking to or sleeping with other girls. Don’t obsess this much about someone who you are not exclusive with. Minimal effort.
I suggest seeking out therapy to discover why you feel this strongly about someone who you have been dating for less than a month. This is not normal. Love yourself first. Boost your self esteem by doing good things for yourself. Be selfish! I do not talk to or see someone often who I’ve just met. Dating once a week and talking 2-3x a week is more than enough. The reason why people get attached too soon is because they keep in touch constantly. Scale back. Remember you should be your very first priority. You can’t love anyone else if you don’t love yourself first.
ANM StaffKeymasterHi Stephy, I hope that asking questions to this forum has helped you gain clarity. I notice you’ve visited here a few times recently. You’re welcome to ask questions!
I do have a favor to ask of you, though. Please, from now on, I’d like you to stick with the same name when posting in this forum. That way, our community members will recognize your name and remember the other conversations that you’ve had with them.
Again, you’re welcome to ask questions and I hope that our community’s responses have been helpful to you. Best wishes!
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