is he actually intrested? or he just wants sex?

Sherri – I had asked him about his last relationship and he had said that he’s been single for 10 months. I had even commented on that not being that long a time and he had reassured me it was plenty of time. at that point I hadn’t really wanted to delve further into exes. I guess you cant take everything someone says at face value. Maybe I was way too trusting. I just wasnt expecting his disappearing act at all.

Harley – thanks for your advice :) it’s actually really helpful.

Sheri – it was a year long relationship. I think that’s pretty good advice to hear about the not getting with someone whos not been single for more than a year after a long-term thing. I definitely didnt want to be the rebound girl and he gave the impression he was all up for potentially long term. He gave me some BS abt reminding him too much of the ex, which is probably a little creepy. Urghh.

Oh yeah they always get back in touch when they need an ego boost. If he does don’t even respond. Ignore and delete. Always learn from past mistakes so you don’t repeat them.

I’m not sure he meant to be manipulative. maybe he genuinely felt it all. .then somewhere along the line it all changed. who knows. but it foes not matter. you will wreak your head analysing it to death. …and still no answers. just let it go. heal. lesson learnt as you say.

Sherri, you have all the right answers.
I want to share with you guys that I have backed away from the online guy and apparently man do love the chase, they like what they cant get!! SO Harley honey you seem to be a very nice girl, drop that douche tell yourself you deserve better. I know its hard but you DO, we all DO.

Ive been talking to this online for like almost three months and I finally met him in person.. when we where talking online he would tell me he likes me and all these other nice things.. when I met him he seem different to me as an good different we chilled and watched TV shows and then we had sex.. before the sex I had asked if we are goin to date or not n he was thinking about it and then said yes.. I dent really know if he reLly wants to be with me or it was just to get in my pants.. he hasn’t messaged me yet but because he uses his sister WiFi to message which I know he tries to get on but I’m still not sure ..

thanks for the advice Harley. think you’re right, there’s unlikely to be contact and no doubt if there is it will jst be an ego trip. guess I will jst concentrate on me and try not to overanalyse the whole situation. it’s so easy to believe people’s words rather than watch their actions. I don’t know if it’s because this generation are so used to communicating by text that we jst end up taking people’s words at face value. texts/ messaging doesn’t really mean much- like you said – I think ill focus on actual speaking a lot more from now on.

Hello all,
I was wondering if you could give me some advice…I met a guy online about 2 months ago. Since then, we’ve seen each other once a week. Last time we were together(5th date) we slept together. Two days later I asked him if he wanted to get together the following Friday and he said that he had plans. He never mentioned that he could go a different day and almost a week has gone by and he still hasn’t asked. He texts me everyday, all day and has done so for the last month and a half. We sext alot too but it’s fun and we crack jokes and such too. I know I’m driving myself crazy but I don’t want to be an option to him and I will not ask him to hang out again. What’s your opinion on this? Am I just being paranoid cuz relationships suck! Thanks in advance!

I have been friends with a guy for the last 3 yrs. We have had a business professional freidnship that has blossomed through the years. When he comes to town for business, we have dinner, laugh, talk business, talk personal, go to concerts (he pays for), walks on the beach, etc. He has invited me numerous times to visit him in PHX but I was dating someone here so I didn’t feel I should go alone yet. however, I did end up going down with a girlfriend as we were visiting a girlfriend of mine and stayed at his 2nd home. He was overly hospitable but he was working the entire time and couldn’t spend much time with us. He doesn’t live there and did spend the night there but told me to sleep in his room. My friends said he was probably uncomfortable since you didn’t come alone. We hugged once then and that was it. He had mentioned a few times in his past visits that I should come down so he can take me to Mexico. He never asked if I was dating anyone and I never asked him.

A few months ago we took a walk on the beach up north where I live and I told him about my upcoming vacation with a group of friends to Mexico. He said he’d love to go and decided to meet me there. I had just broke off an 8 yr relationship and thought “Why Not”/Lets see if there is something to this friendship. We ended up having the most romantic and passionate time. He Kissed me like there was no tomorrow and his hugs were such bear hugs that I felt so loved and cared about. He is a very sincere and respectable man. Needless to say, after 3 yrs of a friendship we hit it off and slept together. The first night was merely holding each other like teddy bears all night. We talked that week about taking another trip and realized we were raised the same and had a lot of things in common. There were a lot of similar commonalities and we were very comfortable together.

Then I got home and it took him 4-5 days to call me. When he did, It was a good conversation. He told me how much fun he had. he agreed that we should start looking into the next trip. He is coming up here in a few weeks for 2 weeks so I’ll see him soon.

I don’t know if he is seeing anyone in PHX but I really don’t think so as he has a business to run that takes up 90% of his time, travels for work a lot and always has a few project going on. He did tell me a yr ago how his last relationship ended and it left him not trusting woman after what she did to him. He was married for 15 yrs before that 4 yr relationship ended.

My question, do I ask him if he is sleeping with someone else when I see him next time and tell him I don’t want to be a booty call when he comes to town or enjoy the time together and see how he acts first. I don’t want to pry or be pushy. I know his schedule is crazy and I think he drowns himself with projects to keep busy. He invited me to his home which I should take him up on but he is not much at sharing his feelings as our intimacy is all new to both of us and vacation is a lot different that everyday life.

Any advise would be great.

Thanks…

So I’ve been dating this guy on tinder, we’ve been on 4 dates but text almost everyday because we both have busy lives and don’t live close by. We established that we wanted to be in an relationship before we had sex, and the sex was really good. We’ve only had sex once because well I went toes him on the 4th date but weren’t in the right situation to hook up, so it hasn’t been just about sex originally. But he went away for two weeks and had no internet connection or signal so we hadn’t talked. But as soon as he got back he messaged me, and said he missed me like crazy need to meet up ASAP. But I already had plans cause its christmas, so I’m seeing him on Saturday and he wants me to come over to his and meet his family and were going out on a date I guess. But he said he has missed my body, he’s addicted and we will end up having sex. But he said he serious about me and thats why he wants me to meet them. But there’s a slight problem I have. He’s still active on tinder, so he’s obviously still talking to other women. He won’t reply to my message until like 2 hours but then will be on tinder 2 minutes ago…If he’s serious why is he still talking to there women? Surely that means he is still on the market but he already said were dating. Like because I’m not with him all the time and he’s such charmer, I don’t know I’m a bit like…why? Asked him how his trip was and he said ‘lots of smoking and drinking’ to which I replied ‘you missed out on the sex’ and he said ‘I would never babe only with you’. Soooo….I just dunno I’m a bit confused and probably need to chill. But could do with some replies to keep my mind at rest!