Is he getting comfortable or pulling away?


Home Forums Dating and Sex Advice Is he getting comfortable or pulling away?

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  • #945012 Reply
    Jenna

    Joe and I have been casually dating for the last 3 months. He just got out of an abusive relationship and told me from the start he isn’t ready to get back into another relationship yet. I’m fine with that because I have some things I need to work out for myself too. Although we’re technically not in a “relationship”, we text each other every day, text good morning and good night, go places together, hold hands, hang out multiple times a week, make out, hook up, cuddle, talk about pretty much everything, and we’ve both told each other we’re not seeing or sleeping with anyone else. Over the last month, sex has been different too. In the beginning, it was more like hooking up – just sex. Now, it’s much more intimate and passionate. More kissing, more holding tight, more cuddling. After after, he holds me close and I put my head on his chest and he wraps his arms around me holding my head and stroking my hair. It’s starting to feel like a relationship is developing. He told me about 2-3 weeks ago that he does really like me and that he wants to have a relationship with me in the future, when we’re both ready. And I told him I feel the same.

    In the last few weeks tho, I’ve noticed a few differences in him. He’s skipped sending a good morning or good night text here and there. And we’ve only hung out 1 or 2 times a week. We used to hang out 4 or 5 times a week. When we’re together, everything seems like before. There is still the closeness and feeling of a relationship developing. It’s just the hang outs aren’t happening as often, and we’re not texting as often throughout the day. He still texts daily, he initiates contact, and makes plans with me. The only difference is it is all less often than before.

    Is this normal? Is he just settling in and getting comfortable? Or is his pulling away? Is this something I should ask him about?

    #945015 Reply
    AngieBaby

    Yes Jenna it’s normal. Nothing wrong here. You’re both on the same page, which is huge. That all day every day texting stuff is a honeymoon period and doesn’t last. Sounds like you’re on solid ground, although when someone starts off with “I’m not ready for a relationship” you have to believe them and not develop big expectations. Not to rain on your parade… it’s still possible he could abruptly pull away if he gets scared, but it really sounds like, so far so good and that’s the best you can ask for! Rooting for you!!!

    #945022 Reply
    Mary

    Jenna, that is a scary place yo be. Piull away and focus on yourself and stop being so available. That is how you have been. Don’t agree to get together at his whim.

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