Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Is he ghosting me or will he contact me?
- This topic has 3 replies and was last updated 2 years, 6 months ago by
M.
-
AuthorPosts
-
Kim
This is the second time I’m posting this, I’m not sure why my posts never really gets any traction so I am trying again and would appreciate all the feedback I can get.
I made a post about this a few days ago and this is just a follow up and update.
Been talking to a guy for about a month, he was really interested in the beginning but when things started getting heated physically I always backed away but he always respected me and never pushed.
But I noticed he was all over the place with his feelings, he always says he misses me and would try to set up a date but it would never happen.
But he always kept communication high.
Until we had a discussion about things getting physical and he said he would get bonded fast with me if he gave me head.
I declined and told him it would lead to sex and I wasn’t ready for sex and we can bond in other ways.
He said that was his fantasy and he is not forcing it on me or anything, just telling me what he would love to do to me.
I stated a coupled of times throughout the convo that I don’t wanna have sex yet and that I wasn’t very comfortable around him yet, he told me that he noticed and I told him that with time and if we hung out more that I’d feel more comfortable and relaxed around him. He said okay he understand and that anything I want. i also told him that he scares me and before I explained what I meant by that the airtime got cut off and I thought we would speak the next day and he would ask me.
But after that convo he never texted or call me , but I see him everyday at the gym and he would talk to me and subtly flirt sometimes and sometimes act cold.
It’s been a week now and no call or text.
So I don’t know if I should say he ghosted me, but I still see his updates so he didn’t delete me and he still talks to me at the gym.
So I don’t understand, I’ve been feeling like I messed things up but I’ve thought about that convo all over again and I don’t think I messed up that bad for him to never speak to me again.
I don’t understand exactly what the problem is.
I like him and I think about him alot, I wanted to text him but I’m not sure what the situation is exactly.Raven
The responses you received on your last post are still relevant… He only wanted sex.
tammy
The situation is very clear. His actions show that he is only interested in sleeping with you and doesn’t want to spend his time getting to know you. You made it quite clear that your not going to get physical unless you know him well and get comfortable enough to take things to the next level. Hence he bailed out. forget him unless your fine with just a fling.
M
Yep, he only wanted sex and not you.
Harsh but that’s the reality of it.When you get wise to this, you’ll recognise the signs earlier and you’ll be able to filter these guys out so they don’t waste your time (or affect your self-worth).
When you start looking for kindness and fun and connection with a guy that has nothing to do with sex, you’re going to enjoy a way more exciting fun and lasting relationship. Then when the sex does happen much further on down the line, it will be wonderful and sweet and safe and he’ll stay with you.
I don’t remember the other post, but the replies on this forum are usually spot on. Listen to them and reflect on them even if you don’t agree and don’t like what you read and hear. Sometimes the posts that don’t get a lot of traction reflect the fact that it’s an open and shut case and what’s been explained is so spot on and accurate that no one feels the need to elaborate any further.
Your situation is really clear and plain to see for the dating veterans amongst us. Soon you’ll be able to see it too and you’ll know exactly what we mean. Avoid the guys who start talking about sexual acts with you early on. They’re only ever interested in one thing, and they don’t give a s**t about you. They will always ghost you ultimately, and the only sad thing about this is that they ever came into your life in the first place.
You can be smarter from now on.
Good luck! 💖
-
AuthorPosts
