Home › Forums › Did He Lose Interest? › Is he really 'busy' or just not into me?
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Lucy.
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Lucy
So I met this guy on a dating site about 1 month ago, and things were great. We texted all the time and even went on a date and had planned our next few dates. Randomly after he got back from vacation he stopped texting me, so i left it a few days before texting him to ask how his holiday went and he replied almost straight away saying ‘Sorry I’ve been busy with work. Yea it was great.’ so i replied a few hours later but no response…again 5 days later I wrote to him asking how his week had been. He replied again almost straight away to say ‘I’ve been swamped at work hense why i haven’t been so talkative recently’. I left it 4 days before replying and its been 3 days and he hasn’t texted me. All i said was ‘ hope you’re managing to get some rest in your busy week.’
Do you think he is really busy or is he not got the guts to say he isn’t into me? I dont want to text him until he texts me but i feel i have been doing all the work. I’m just shocked as he seemed so lovely and i thought he liked me.
Juliette
Hi Lucy
I’m not sure what you mean by you had planned your next few dates. Did he not show up at something you had planned? Has it been a month since your actual date or just a couple of weeks?
Either way, I would leave it up to him to contact you. It could be that he is actually busy, or he met someone else, or for lack of a better phrase he’s just not feeling it. Typically if a guy wants to see you again after a first meeting, he will contact you right away to ask. In the meantime, get back on that dating site and go on more dates with other guys.
good luck! :)lucy
Hi Juliette,
He had planned for us to meet again but we didn’t sort out a date. He just said when he got back from vacation as we went on our first date just before he went on vacation. Its been 2 weeks since he got back and 3 weeks since our first date.
lucy
He texted me while he was on vacation every day which i wasn’t expecting. Thats why I’m confused. He even said how much he was looking forward to our second date.
Veronica
Hi Lucy,
That is super annoying. I would say he either had a change of heart at some point for whatever reason, or maybe started talking to someone else. After only a month of dating I wouldnt be surprised if he was still going on dates and might have met someone else.
He also could geniunely be busy. You really never know. I would say do not contact him at all. If you don’t hear from him for a week, though, I would say time to forget about him.
Also – unless y’all had set plans for a date – I find that guys tend to say stuff like “lets get drinks soon!” “lets do dinner when you get back” but aren’t completely serious about it. I think they are only really totally serious when they actually schedule a day and time to meet.
In the mean time, do your own thing. Hell, maybe even go on another date. If you don’t want to do that – just keep yourself busy!!! Easier said than done I know ;)
Please keep us posted what happens. Wish you the best of luck with everything.
lucy
Thanks Veronica. Its hard but I’m glad it happened now and not when it was more serious. My guy friends say he probably is busy but i never know if they say that because they dont want me to feel sad. I’m just gonna get on with my life. I did leave texting him for 4 days so maybe he will wait a little longer before replying. I cant really be bothered with him if he is like that though. I’ve met a few other guys that i like so i will just chat to them and prob will forget about this guy. Will keep you updated. Thanks again :)
Veronica
Good for you!! Keep talking to the other guys and if he wants to reach out to you later than you can play it by ear… or maybe it will be too late and you will have already met someone you like better :)
Good luck
Juliette
Hi Lucy
Sounds like you know what you need to do. Just chalk it up to a fun date and keep on with your life and get busy meeting other people. Take care!Lucy
Well still haven’t heard anything so guess that’s it. It kinda sucks as I thought he was a nice guy but guess I should be glad that it wasn’t more serious. Men are so clever how they make you think they like you and then just stop contacting you at a drop of a hat. I can’t be bothered with men like that. Life is too short
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