Home › Forums › Did He Lose Interest? › Is there hope for something or nahhh?
- This topic has 10 replies and was last updated 4 years, 5 months ago by
kaye.
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Lily
I know a lot of people asked similar questions, but I just wanted to come on here and see a concrete reply to my “issue”… We weren’t dating, we just worked together. He usually took me home in his car when we had the same shift, and even when we were not at work, we talked all the time. He messaged me at 2 a.m because he couldn’t sleep, said he told me everything… He literally called me love in one of his texts. When he walked past me, he brushed his hand on my lower back. I think there was something there, even our colleagues teased us… But with quarantine, we started talking less and now we never talk. He didn’t even respond to my latest message. Sometimes he texts me asking how I’m doing, but our conversations are really flat. I asked him and he said he was stressed and he had other things going on and I get that, most people are stressed because of everything that’s been going on but still. I feel like if he liked me like that, he would make more effort. What do you guys think?
kaye
I think it’s clear he likes you and flirts with you, but if he REALLY liked you enough to want to date you I feel like he would have made a move by now. He takes you home, so what would keep him from asking if you wanted to stop for dinner or drinks? Or you asking him to come on into your place for drinks or to watch a movie or something? Clearly there is something stopping him from taking that next step.
If he messaged you about EVERYTHING then why did it never turn into something more? Why did he never ask you out or want to hang out? Being stressed or busy is such an easy excuse for a guy. And where I live things are pretty much getting back to normal from the quarantine and people are having parties again, going out to dinner, etc. which makes his disappearing act even more suspicious. Do you know if he has a girlfriend? Or what about an ex girlfriend he could have re-connected with during quarantine?
cupcake
Have you posted about this before? The 2 am thing sounds familiar.
Does he have a fiancé? Someone that you think he is unhappy with? You think he is only marrying her because of some sense of responsibility? He brings her along whenever you meet outside work but you still think he would rather be with you than her?
That was your post wasn’t it a few wks ago?
If he was interested in you romantically he would have taken the leap and ask you out. Or at least try to get closer to you in some other way…he has not. Move on. Don’t waste your time on someone who is most likely just using you as an ego boost/emotional support buddy
Newbie
Cupcake maybe right but even if just go with this post i dont see anything out of the ordinary that sees you as someone to really date. He probably likes you, may even be attracted to you, but thats it. The problem with finding a partner there are a lot of those almost yessses. But both parties have to feel an extra chemistry to get beyond friendship or superficial attraction. Im sure you have had this with guys yourself too.
Its very easy to get sucked in with this kind of breadcrumbing but a guy asks you out if he is interested. Try flirting all over town but work. That wil get you startedLily
No, I have not asked on here yet. :) I’m new. We are only in our early twenties. And he said before that once quarantine is over, I could go out with him and his friends to have a drink. But that was like 2 months ago, and we haven’t really talked much since then. I think he felt uncomfortable because we worked together, and some of our colleagues made us feel uncomfortable. I don’t know if he’s dating anyone, I feel awkward asking something like that. :) I pretty much think the same thing as you guys. That he is interested much not that interested. Our conversations nowadays are pretty awkward. Do you think I should still try to talk with him? Thank you for your reply! :)
redcurleysue
Do not date where you work – it will turn out badly.
Lily
I don’t work there anymore, only he does.
Newbie
No sorry, but i think its pointless to relight when the flame os not there (anymore). Guys go for what they want. They really do. If this man is interested, he would stay in touch and ask you out. That is not happening. So i wouldnt text him again if i were you. Pull back and see of he comes back
cupcake
In that case i would just keep it friendly but professional. Workplace romance can be awkward anyways and should be avoided. I don’t see a reason for not talking to him anymore but if you have romantic feelings for him i would keep my distance a bit. It doesn’t look like he is interested to the point of asking you out.
Lily
Alright, thank you, guys! :)
kaye
Going out with him AND his friends to have a drink is not a DATE!! You say you haven’t talked much in the last 2 months. And if you don’t work there anymore he can’t use the excuse of being uncomfortable because you work together.
I wouldn’t make any effort to talk to him at this point. You’re wasting your time. Besides why do you want to continue when the conversations are awkward? You can’t force chemistry or being comfortable with someone. Just let this one go and find a guy who is crazy about you and wants to date you!!!
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