Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Messed up a hook up. Embarrassed
- This topic has 9 replies and was last updated 4 years, 10 months ago by T from NY.
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Dakota
So I started talking to a guy on tinder at about 3pm in the afternoon. Very flirty very quickly. Said I wanted to see him that night and sex was on the agenda. He told me to keep in touch. I then sent a text at 7.45pm saying I was ready to leave and where should I come to. He took well over an hour to answer by which time I had given up and had my pyjamas on!
We talked for another hour and I asked him to send a cab by which time it was late. Then I made a very rookie mistake. He sent an uber and I did not realise that they do not tell you when they have arrived. I never use them. So I was sitting waiting for the doorbell to ring or to get a text. Ooops.
He then text me to tell me they had cancelled the trip by which time I was in a really bad mood and just told him to forget it. Trouble is I feel so guilty. That I really led him on. Urgggg, I feel horrible and embarrassed.
Am i making too much of this? I sent a text the next day apologising. Even though I have never met the guy I feel I humiliated him. Am I going over the top with worrying about this?
aliaYes, if you are a hooker you really messed up a job. You had an opportunity to make a couple hundred dollars. If you’re not a hooker you can sleep soundly in your Pjs, you didn’t mess up anything.
AnnWho goes to guys houses they don’t know for sex
SandyWouldn’t waste time worrying. Nothing lost. Could have been grim turning up late just for sex. As someone else said you would feel like a prostitute.
amy sJesus are you really not concerned about personal safety ? He sends the cab and you go to his house for sex that you have promised to have. What if he was a catfish and is a 70 year old chubber or worse a psychopath. You really could have had a lucky escape here. You need to think about your safety in this day and age and you sound like you have no idea. Scary stuff. imagine if your pal or daughter said they were doing this would you not be horrified ??
FrannyThis is a terrible idea, just TERRIBLE, and you should be thankful it didn’t happen.
DakotaHe was staying at a well known hotel so l thought that kind of reduced the risk but l get what everyone is saying. I am such a man pleaser and get suckered in with any form of attention
FrannyPlease have more respect for yourself.
I was abducted and sexually assaulted by a stranger while just waiting to meet a friend for lunch. Going to a stranger’s hotel room is tantamount to walking into a lion’s den.
Delete Tinder, it is awful.
DeeScary story. Never put yourself at such risk again.
T from NYI have had very good experiences with Tinder. This is not about an app – because sexual assaults have happened to people I know with people they reconnected from high school or family friends set them up. This is about being unbelievably ignorant about your personal safety.
I am not judging your interest in casual sex. You’re an adult and can be into that and no one should judge. But I am concerned you seem to have no idea how to keep yourself safety and seem to lack personal dignity. Even when I was using Tinder for occasional casual sex – I made the man work for it, background checked his telephone number and name, met in public, got pic of his license to send to friends before I went anywhere with him after several dates.
Don’t ever allow a man to order you like a pizza. Adopt a radical self love program. I am serious.
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